Thread by @rajamanirajesh

One thread on sir-ing and anna-ing people.

There is this strange and amusing phenomenon I have noticed in the Tamil film industry networks. And in fact, this is true for the Tamil political circles as well.

Whenever you meet someone who is even slightly younger to you (or sometimes even older than you), they always begin addressing you profusely as 'anna' or 'sir'.

But because I have been uncomfortable with both these terms, I often tell them that they could just call me by my first name. They initially hesitate to do that. But after repeated nudging, they agree to address you by your first name.

But the strange thing is, in both these circles, when people start calling you by your first name, their behaviour towards you quickly disintegrates into disrespect and enters a zone of escalating bad manners.

And you are often surprised at the quick change in their tone and behavior. It is almost as if they can't be respectful towards someone without calling them 'anna' or 'sir'. The moment you discourage them to use these two terms, they assume it is an invitation to behave badly.

So after a point, I let people call me as 'anna' or 'sir', even though I totally cringe hearing them. But then, in almost all these cases, I realize that people more or less remain respectful. And there isn't much change in their behavior towards you.

Which is strange, but you at least don't have to deal with their rudeness anymore.

If you think about it, the Government or the corporate sector is well defined in its hierarchy.

So people who work in these places know who they should suck up to and who they can take for granted. But this is not the same with the film industry or political circles. In both these places, except for those at the very top, the fortunes of the rest fluctuates greatly.

And people are never sure who to respect and how much to respect. So I suppose they more or less hide behind these sir, ma'am, anna and akka terms.

Unfortunately, in a hierarchical caste society, this seems to be the only way people know to socialize with each other.

They can either put you on a pedestal. Or put you down. There hardly seems to be a middle ground.

So whether you like it or not, you are forced to play by its rules. These days, I accept the 'anna's and 'sir's after putting up some faint initial resistance. Because it works better that way.