Thread by @SlavaMalamud

I have lived in America for exactly 30 years, and I have figured out how the political system here works (thread).
Voter: "Hi, I am a regular white American voter, proudly voting in my home state. I'll elect a Republican executive because I don't want any of that socialism here"

Republican governor: (proceeds to utterly fuck everything up to the point where everyone, except for a handful of very rich people literally can't take it anymore)
Voter: "Hi, it's now 4 years later. I will vote for a Democrat because we seem to be headed down the wrong path"

Same voter: "But I will also elect a Republican legislature because I think that Democrats must reach across the aisle and someone should keep them from doing all the socialism here."
Democrat executive: (proceeds to flail helplessly as GOP legislature stifles him at every step)

Voter: "Hi, it appears that Democrats can't get anything done. So sad. I guess, it's time to elect responsible Republicans back into office again and let them get some much-needed reform pass."
Republicans: (proceed to fuck everything up, while rigging the electoral system)

Voter: "Hi, I'm growing concerned with our politicians' inability to make any progress. I wish both sides stopped playing political games and got around to helping regular Americans, such as myself. In the next election, I'll tune out the noise and vote common sense" (votes GOP)

Republicans: "AAARRRRGHHH!!!! ALL THE POWERRRRR!!! GIVE US VAGINA TO REGULATE!!!! JESUS GUNS AND NO SCHOOL AND TAXES!!!! GGGGGRRRRRRRRLLLUUGGG!"
State/Country: "Hi, where am I going, and what is this handbasket for? Are Democrats to blame?"
Democrats: (look sad)

Voter: "Gee, Washington, DC sure seems broken. It must be all that socialism going on. Hey, this Republican candidate seems nice!"
Republican candidate: (giggles through facial tics)
Voter: "Now, let's get some good things done for the Main Street!" (bites into a hot dog, whoops)