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10 Jun, 4 tweets, 2 min read
They’re doing a WALTONS remake over at the CW and the cast looks exactly like what you’d expect the cast of a WALTON’s remake at the CW to look like
variety.com/2021/tv/news/t…
Deadline ran a side-by-side picture of the guys playing John Walton, Sr. in 1971 and 2021 and uh holy crap that says something about the two eras, huh
So check this out: THE WALTONS was based on a TV movie with a different cast, meaning John Walton Sr. has three actors. Here they are:

Andrew Duggan (1971, aged 48)
Ralph Waite (1972 series, aged 44)
Ben Lawson (2021 series, aged 41)
Andrew Duggan

Andrew Duggan was a *hard* forty-eight, huh

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David Hines Profile picture
10 Jun
The most interesting thing about the Mike Lindell stuff is how it keeps demonstrating the limits of throwing money at one’s problems
A lot of Righties (fringe and mainstream alike) are convinced of that money is the problem, that they could rise up and beat the establishment and the Lefties if only the money were there.

don’t get me wrong, money *helps*

but it won’t magically make you know what you’re doing
Mike Lindell is willing to set hundreds of millions of dollars on fire for his cause when he would have done better to just sit back and quietly fund stuff

but pugnacious Righties gotta pugnace
Read 4 tweets
David Hines Profile picture
8 Jun
The Moose-feeding movie of the last few days: THUNDERHEART (1992), with Val Kilmer as a quarter-Sioux FBI agent sent to be diversity on an Indian reservation murder case despite the fact that he has run as far from his heritage as he can get. With Sam Shepard and Graham Greene!
For most of its length THUNDERHEART is a quiet little mystery drama, but in the last act it goes *off the chain* with a terrific action sequence involving Val Kilmer and Graham Greene in a car chase/shootout with corrupt feds, tribal government thugs, and goons in a technical!
The movie is so heavily inspired by (and enraptured by) American Indian Movement stuff in the seventies that it’s honestly kind of wild that it wound up getting made.
Read 8 tweets
David Hines Profile picture
25 Apr
SPONTANEOUS (2020) is on Prime and everybody was right: it is terrific, the HEATHERS of the 2020s in that it’s a bantery movie about teenagers dying horrible deaths, but it’s also not the HEATHERS of the 2020s because it’s not about high school at all.
SPONTANEOUS is a movie that’s about what it’s like to get old. It’s just that it stars young people.

At first one of your contemporaries dies, and it’s a shock.

Then you lose a couple more. You try to stem the tide.

Then people start going in waves.
By telling a story where young people experience the loss of their compatriots in a way that mimics the effect on old people of losing their friends to old age, SPONTANEOUS puts fresh eyes on what that process feels like. It’s a novel way to purify the problem.
Read 6 tweets
David Hines Profile picture
31 Mar
If this entire story is true, a) the NYT hit is indeed egregious and b) MATT GAETZ IS THE STUPIDEST MOTHERFUCKER ALIVE, HOLY SHIT
washingtonexaminer.com/news/documents…
24 hours from getting the instructions for payment in an extortion scheme as part of an FBI investigation and you blow the whole thing about your dad secretly cooperating with the feds BECAUSE YOU GET MAD OVER A NEWS HIT IN THE NYT?!?!?!?!?!
RIGHT BEFORE THE GUYS EXTORTING YOU COMMIT THE NEXT STEP IN THE FEDERAL CRIME THAT WILL SEND THEM TO POUND-ME-IN-THE-ASS-PRISON?!

YOU CAN’T WAIT ONE FUCKING DAY, YOU TROLLFACED GOBSTOPPER?!?!?!?!!!
Read 7 tweets
David Hines Profile picture
29 Mar
The Moose-feeding movie of Saturday night/Sunday morning (he woke up late night and was fussy) was LET'S SCARE JULIE (2018) on @Shudder, a well-meant but muddled ultra-low budget horror flick that falls short for a whole lot of reasons.
Premise: teen girls at a slumber party decide to scare the new girl across the street, who is home alone; this is a bad idea.

Gimmick: it's shot as one long take! Sort of!

Problem: The gimmick adds nothing to the movie, and is not competently executed.
Real talk: any attempt to shoot a feature film in one take inevitably bumps into real-world limitations imposed by the medium: hard drive space, or battery power, or (in the case of Hitchcock's ROPE (1948)) the size of a can of film.

There will be cuts. You have to hide them.
Read 9 tweets
David Hines Profile picture
28 Feb
Today’s Moose-feeding movie is HIGH MOON (2019), wherein an Old West cowboy kills a werewolf outlaw gang before being dispatched by his interdimensional ninja mentor only to be resurrected in the present day where the also-resurrected werewolves have become a *motorcycle* gang.
JOE BOB BRIGGS VOICE. “Sure we’ve seen it before, but have we seen it *like this?!*”
Writer/director Josh Ridgway serves up a bit of a mixed bag: the premise is lunacy, the gore makeup is good, the werewolf makeup is terrible, the fights are decent, the cinematography is dull, all the scenes are too long.
Read 5 tweets

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