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30 Jun, 5 tweets, 1 min read
So is Reagan's. JFK at least may have saved the Earth from extinction.
Seriously, why is Reagan a top 10 president? He had nothing to do with the death of the Soviet Union, his administration was criminal, his economic policy based on fairy tales and crass thievery. A winning smile and America's indescribable infatuation with right wing politics?
Like, this whole idea that "Reagan won the Cold War" is one of the most inane myths of Americana. Guys, I was there! None of us were like, "OMG, Reagan is killing our country! Stop, Reagan, what are you doing?"
Reagan had zero effect on anything. Literally, my grandma did more.
Oh wow, a country cobbled together from ethnic pseudo-states whose inhabitants hate each other passionately, bound together by cruelty, in a state of a slow economic collapse in a non-workable system, run by inflexible ideologues... How could it collapse on its own? No way!
On the other hand, it's not like a clumsy, repressive Russian state lurching haphazardly between half-hearted reforms and reactionary panic has ever collapsed without the direct intervention of an American president, right?
Never happened before.

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More from @SlavaMalamud

Slava Malamud Profile picture
30 Jun
Here is Slava's Short Explanation on Why Russian States Collapse.
Spoiler alert: American presidents have zero things to do with it.
Basically, it goes as such. The Russian state has basically remained the same since its founding by Ivan III in the late XV century...
It stands on the following pillars:
* Absolute centralization (any self-rule is lethal to the state)
* Primacy of state's interest over individual rights
* A sanctified absolute ruler
* The laws are relative and exist not to ensure justice but to support the power structure
This system is not without its merits. It can be very effective in warding off external threats, mobilizing the nation to combat (or at least weather) crises and holding together an ethnically diverse empire by the force of sheer cruelty.
But it's not designed to evolve or reform
Read 7 tweets
Slava Malamud Profile picture
30 Jun
It serves as a great caulking material for winterizing your windows, no argument here. I speak from experience, because this is the exact purpose we used it for upon discovering a jar in our Welcome Refugees package in 1991.
It came in a great big jar without a label, probably from military supplies or something. We opened it, saw a lot of very brown, very sticky goo and were forced to assume it was an adhesive, a wall sealer or winterizing material. The latter seemed most logical, it being October.
Someone who'd lived in the States since the 70s told us that no, Americans actually eat it. We didn't believe it and asked how they eat it.
He said, "I'll be fucked if I know, but they do, somehow. Maybe fry shit on it or something?"
We laughed and winterized the windows with it.
Read 5 tweets
Slava Malamud Profile picture
30 Jun
Captain's Log, Star Date 99094.95
"Last night, the Praetor of the Romulan Empire spoke to me in my dreams, and his words were glorious. Over the objections of Mr. Spock and the damnations of Bones, I am beginning my new mission: to bring the glory of Romulus to this puny galaxy!"
For those blissfully aware what RT is, it's the main outlet of Kremlin's propaganda overseas. Its mission is to spread Putin's lies and disinformation, sow disenchantment in Western democracies and promote either anarchy or authoritarianism, depending on the audience.
Kremlin has long been cultivating either B-list celebrities (Steven Seagal, Gerard Depardieu, MMA fighter Jeff Monson) or cashiered former A-listers (Larry King, Roy Jones, Jr.) to promote Russia and contrast it with the corrupt, evil, warmongering West.
And there goes Kirk.
Read 4 tweets
Slava Malamud Profile picture
28 Jun
I have always held that in the Marvel Universe, the only true indicator of who is good and who is evil is the level of handsomeness. The handsomer the character is, the less evil he/she will wind up being.
It's amazing how true my theory is!!
For instance, in the newly released "Black Captain vs. Romanian Fist Man", the "New Captain America" is clearly not handsome enough to hold up the Old Captain's torch, so you can tell from the get-go he will turn evil. I mean, this is just obvious.
But now I am watching a film called "Strange Doctor", even though it's about Sherlock Holmes, and here is a piece of dialogue from there.
Holmes Man: You are evil!
Runny-Face: No, I serve the power that is actually good!
Holmes Man: Dude! LOOK AT YOUR FACE!
Runny-Face: Oh. Touche
Read 5 tweets
Slava Malamud Profile picture
22 Jun
You may think that this is a terrible play by a Russian defender. But I have been watching Russian football for almost half a century, and I struggle to think of a play that was ever any better than this.
This is truly how football in Russia is played. All the time.
I mean, two straight backward passes, the second one to the keeper is practically a copyright of Russian football. In the old Soviet league, goalkeeper was the intended receiver of about 93% of all passes. This is literal truth. Look it up.
I was a goalkeeper in a Soviet club. The first thing I was taught is how to receive a pass from a terrified defender. The second thing was how to raise my arm demanding offside is called.
These were the only two things anyone was taught. The rest was just: "Mmm, catch the ball?"
Read 4 tweets
Slava Malamud Profile picture
22 Jun
Watching another one of the Marvel films with my kid, I am absolutely appalled with the cavalier way these stories treat human life. As long as it's not one of the costumed fascist Ubermenschen, none of the millions of victims are ever mourned or given a spare thought.
Here is an idea for a Marvel film. Make it about this German cop, obligingly shooting the Romanian Uber Soldier precisely into the tiny area of his body where he can't be hurt.
Tell the story of why his years of training have failed him in this situation. Tell the story of trauma
Tell the story of what the second-degree concussion he suffered for this shot did to his brain. The nightmares, the headaches, the disorientation, the inability to work, the partial memory loss...
Read 7 tweets

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