Dealing with extreme changes can be hard; whether you’re losing your job, getting financially broke or starting a family, ending relationships, affected by illness,…
You may feel lost, don’t know where to turn and you trust neither yourself nor others.
“You’re destabilized by uncertainty.”
But as the philosopher-king, Marcus Aurelius, once said:
“The universe is change.”
You should accept that it happens. The universe is full of change and we’re a part of the universe, so we are a part of that change.
The reason we lose ourselves facing extreme events is that we don’t know how to cope with them.
We waste our time, making thoughtless wrong decisions. We act out of fear and reach for any possibility without knowing them.
N. N. Taleb in his book “Antifragile” explains two concepts of behaviors when facing extreme changes:
• Antifragility
• Fragility
- The fragile needs to control the environment in order to maintain its normal condition, but a small change in the environment can result in devastating consequences
- The antifragile always maintains or improves its current condition in response to changes in the environment
What’s an example of being antifragile?
When Hercules fights Hydra, every time he cuts off one of her heads, two grow back.
So every time she is hurt, she actually gets stronger.
So, How to survive extreme life events?
Read the following tweets of this thread, read it again and then implement:
1. Resist your resistance to change
The first and most important step is to give up our resistance to change.
Accept the truth or you will keep resisting and denying it until you lose your current position and see yourself in an even darker place.
When you face uncertainty, know that there’s nothing wrong with you. It’s just the way of life.
Life is a war, so be a thug.
2. Accept the unchangeable
What’s happened has happened.
Acceptance:
- Will heal us
- Turns our fears into opportunities
- Brings freedom and peace of mind
- And opens a new era to our lives
3. Change the changeable
A wise man once said: “Life is like a game of cards. The hand you are dealt is determinism; the way you play it is free will.”
At any given moment, you have the power to create your reality. You get to shape:
- Your inner world by challenging negativity
- Your outer behavior by controlling how we react to our environment
Now that you know what to do after a big event in your life, it’s time to ask what you can do to receive minimum damage from experiencing an extreme event?
In other words how to maximum infragility?
Here are three steps:
1. Embrace uncertainty
Antifragility loves uncertainty. It learns from trial and error and creates a robust structure.
An antifragile mind doesn’t underestimate history and knows anything’s possible.
2. Embrace optionality
Optionality simply means having lots of options.
If you develop skills with many possible job opportunities, you have more optionality than someone who develops a skill that only has one or two job opportunities.
The advantage is that as the world gets more and more unpredictable, you can thrive despite not knowing the future.
3. Embrace the information
One strategy to antifragility is to revise the schedule based on new critical information.
Don’t be a prisoner of plans.
We make hundreds if not thousands of different choices each and every day.
Everything you choose creates your reality. Most of this happens unconsciously.
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