You've heard the expression “no pain no gain.” Psychologists have shown that the most powerful personal transformations come from experiencing the pain from mistakes that a person never wants to have again—known as “hitting bottom.” (1/4) 
So don't be hesitant to give people those experiences or have them yourself. While it is important to be clear to people about what they are doing well, it is even more important to point out their weaknesses and have them reflect on them. (2/4)
Problems require more time than things that are going well. They must be identified and understood and addressed, while things that are running smoothly require less attention. (3/4)
Instead of celebrating how great we are, we focus on where we need to improve, which is how we got to be so great. (4/4)
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