A lot of people are making a fuss about the Capitol stormer who bought 37 guns after he was released from custody.
However, when you examine things more carefully, it's a lot more innocuous.
However, when you examine things more carefully, it's a lot more innocuous.
Gun #1 was simply for self-protection, something everybody can empathize with. Gun #2 was backup self-protection. Gun #3 was backup for the backup, which is obviously just being careful.
Guns #4-6 were mostly for replacement parts for Guns #1-3. After this, Gun #7 was just sitting there by itself on the shelf, looking so lonely that you pretty much just had to buy it.
Guns #8-9 were for his summer home and Gun #10 was for his toolshed. Guns #11-#12 were only purchased for varmint control. Gun #13 had an etched autograph from Charleton Heston, so he had to get that one.
Guns #14 to #17 were bought for holidays and special circumstances, while Gun #18 had the prettiest little holster you could possibly imagine. Guns #19-21 were previously owned by a little old lady who only used them on her way to church on Sundays.
Guns #22 and #23 were purchased purely to compensate for other shortcomings. Gun #24 was a whim. Guns #25-28 were for the children. Gun #29 reminded him of a gun his high school sweetheart used to have.
Guns #30-32 were purchased with silver bullets in case of a werewolf apocalypse. Gun #33 was purchased by accident; thick thumbs! Guns #34 to #36 were bought primarily fill in unsightly gaps in the gun safe.
And Gun #37 was purchased especially for the next storming of the Capitol. Yeehaw!
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