A woman takes her 20-year-old daughter to the doctor...
The doctor says, “Okay, Madam, what’s the problem?”
The mother says, “It’s my daughter, Becky. She keeps getting these cravings, she’s putting on weight, and is sick most mornings.”
The doctor gives Becky a good examination,
then turns to the mother and says, “Well, I don’t know how to tell you this, but your Becky is pregnant – about 4 months, would be my guess..”
The mother says, “Pregnant?! She can’t be, she has never ever been left alone with a man! Have you Becky ?”
Becky says, “No mother! I’ve never even kissed a man, I’m still a virgin!”
The doctor walked over to the window and just stood there staring out into orbit. About five minutes passed and finally, the mother says, “Is there something wrong out there doctor?”
The doctor replies, “No, not really, it’s just that the last time anything like this happened, a star appeared in the east and three wise men came over the hill. And there’s no way I’m going to miss it this time .😂😂😂

• • •

Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to force a refresh
 

Keep Current with chijiоke, Ph.D., Nuclear Engineering(Affidavit).

chijiоke, Ph.D., Nuclear Engineering(Affidavit). Profile picture

Stay in touch and get notified when new unrolls are available from this author!

Read all threads

This Thread may be Removed Anytime!

PDF

Twitter may remove this content at anytime! Save it as PDF for later use!

Try unrolling a thread yourself!

how to unroll video
  1. Follow @ThreadReaderApp to mention us!

  2. From a Twitter thread mention us with a keyword "unroll"
@threadreaderapp unroll

Practice here first or read more on our help page!

More from @Ekwulu

10 Sep
''What happened today (Yesterday) in Owerri, is a sad reality of how divided President Buhari has succeeded in dividing this nation.
Besides the sit-at-home order, most politicians of the region avoided Owerri.
Could it be the unpopularity of Hope Uzodimma?
Outside Dave Umahi of Ebonyi that is in bed with Buhari and the host governor, the majority of the SE Governors sent their deputies.
As if that wasn't enough, most house of representatives and senators from the region avoided IMO completely.
One take easy form today is that as
a leader, always ensure to carry everyone along.Even if they did not vote for you, once you emerge, integrate all and not consider some as outcast.
Since I was born, this is the first time a president visit looks like a burial ceremony of a railway worker that his pension
Read 5 tweets
7 Sep
IGNORANCE BREEDS FANATISM
′′ The judge asked the killer of former Egyptian president Anwar Sadat why did you kill Sadat?
He said to him, Because he is secular!
The judge replied: What secular means?
The killer said: I don't know!
In the case of the attempted assassination of the
late Egyptian writer ′′ Naguib Mahfouz ", the judge asked the man who stabbed Naguib Mahfouz: Why did you stab him?
The terrorist said: Because of his novel ′′ The children of our neighbourhood ".
The judge asked him: Have you read this novel?
The criminal said: No!
Another judge asked the terrorist who killed the Egyptian writer 'Faraj Fara': Why did you murder Faraj Fouda?
The terrorist replied: Because he is an unfaithful!
The judge asked him: How did you know he was an unfaithful?
The terrorist replied: According to the books he wrote?
Read 4 tweets
7 Sep
HONESTY AND SELF-RESPECT
A Merchant wanted to purchase a gorgeous camel in the market and after spotting one began to settle for it with the seller!
There was a long bargain between the merchant and the camel seller, and finally the merchant bought the camel and took it home!
On reaching home, the merchant called his servant to take out the camel's kajava (saddle) ..!
Under the Kajave, the servant found a small velvet bag which upon opening revealed him to be full of precious diamond gems ..!
The servant shouted, "Boss, you bought a camel, but look
what came with it for free!"
The Merchant was also surprised, he saw diamonds in his servant's hands which were shining and twinkling even more in the sunlight!
The Merchant said: "I have bought a camel and not the diamonds, I should return it immediately!"
Read 8 tweets
26 Aug
A young Nigerian immigrant had just joined a company as a salesman for toothbrushes. He came with a reputation for methods that were unorthodox but effective, and his new boss was a little wary about dealing with his newest hire.
To start the salesman off, the manager gave him
an assignment at a little booth in a nearby shopping mall. For the first week, the manager deliberately kept away, waiting to see what results this young upstart might produce.
When the young man’s first weekly sales report came in, the manager called him to the office
immediately.
“You wanted to see me, boss?”
“Did you know you sold more than a hundred toothbrushes in your first week with us? That is ten times more than our best week ever so far!”
The young Nigerian salesman shrugged his shoulders. “Nothing to it.”
Read 8 tweets
25 Aug
In August 2015,the Punch had an interview with Bishop Mathew Hassan Kukah👇
PUNCH:Don’t you think BUHARI needs to take his time to appoint the right people to work with in order to have round pegs in round holes?
BISHOP KUKAH:The President can take all the time in the world; it will never be a guarantee of the quality of his choice. Jesus prayed before choosing his disciples; he knew every man’s character, but Judas was in the crowd. I hear Nigerians harping on choosing the right people.
How do you measure the right people? Is my ability to write a good article, the fact that I went to Oxford, Cambridge, and Yale, all evidence that I am a good material? I think all the President should do is appoint people, read the riot act, lay down the minimum of
Read 5 tweets
25 Aug
The Pope gets an invitation to speak at the UN in New York. His plane arrives late and so as he gets into his limo tells the driver to put his foot down .
The driver is worried about getting a ticket so he doesn't go too fast. The Pope gets so angry and he says
“ you get in the back-I’ll drive!”
He shoots off at a terrific pace and sure enough gets pulled over by a cop. The cop takes one look in the window and calls the station.
Hey I got a real big shot here speeding. Not sure what to do.
His sergeant says “ what do you mean big shot?
Who is it- the Mayor??
Cop: No- bigger!

Sergeant: The Governor?
Cop: No- bigger than him.
Sergeant: F*ck- not the President is it??
Cop: No - bigger than the President!
Sergeant: Well if it's not the President who the hell is it??
Read 4 tweets

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!


This site is made by just two indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member ($3/month or $30/year) and get exclusive features!

Become Premium

Too expensive? Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal Become our Patreon

Thank you for your support!

Follow Us on Twitter!

:(