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Sep 14, 2021 59 tweets 18 min read Read on X
The MD guide to the 60 greatest things found in the back of our cupboards. In order.

Number 60

A tin of Marvel. Consistency of the Great Barrier Reef. Would immediately be arrested for possession of crack cocaine in the event of a police raid today.
Number 59

A small tin of oil
Number 58

A Protect and Survive pamphlet.

'You never know'
Number 57

A lonely tin of unloved soup
Number 56

A solid block of Pine Radox
Number 55

The unimaginable horror of an opened 10 year old jar of Heinz Cucumber Spread.
Number 54

Non-stick sticking plasters.
Number 53

Out of date, dates
Number 52

A highly erratic rubber torch. Never worked during power cuts.
Number 51

An unopened bottle of Quink.

"Bloody hell - it's William Shakespeare!"
Number 50

Calamine Lotion
Number 49

An incomplete puncture repair kit.

Last used on a Space Hopper in 1981.
Number 48

An empty, capless Bonjela tube
Number 47

A rusting tin of Banana Nesquik
Number 46

A 12 year old box of All-Bran. For when 'you needed to go'
Number 45

A single Victory V or Fisherman's Friend
Number 44

A tin of mustard
Number 43

Embassy vouchers and Green Shield stamps.
Number 42

Random Mousetrap parts
Number 41

TCP
Number 40

A tin of Evo Stik that cannot and never will be able to be opened.
Number 38

Milk of Magnesia
Number 37

The never ending tin of lighter fuel
Number 36

A tin of Lux
Number 35

Fiery Jack
Number 34

A plectrum, capo and pitch pipes. The guitar long-gone or still yet to arrive
Number 33

Tartare sauce with lemon
Number 32

Pernod, Martini and Ouzo
Number 31

Treacle
Number 30

Birthday cake candles.

Always one short.
Number 29

A cassette head cleaner
Number 28

Hardened shoe polish
Number 27

Dettol
Number 26

A manual.

For a fridge. A FRIDGE.

A fridge you no longer own.
Number 25

Fuse wire
Number 24

Custard powder
Number 23

The button tin
Number 22

Vicks
Number 21

A solidified pack of the dreaded Old English Spangles
Number 20

A very sticky bottle of Veno's.
Number 19

The widely despised, Smash.

The future. With black lumps in it.
Number 18

The mysterious Witch Hazel
Number 17

Milk bottle tops

Always meant to send them off to the Blue Peter appeal but never got round to it.
Number 16

Blakey's segs
Number 15

Creamola/Andrews
Number 14

An empty cigar tin containing foreign coins and a threepenny bit.
Number 13

An Ericsson phone
Number 12

Encarta '95
Number 11

The bath cube. Simultaneously softened the water and gritted the bath. The nearest thing we got to luxury in the 70s. Only to be used for *best*. Quaint packaging with a terrifying list of unpronounceable chemical ingredients.
Number 10

Atora
Number 9

A copy of Chariot of the Gods?
Number 8

Raffle tickets
Number 7

Germolene
Number 6

A lone, sinister Jumping Jack
Number 5

A 22 year old can of can of Carnation
Number 4

Haliborange
Number 3

"Camp" Coffee
Number 2

Swarfega
🏅 Number One 🏅

Ambre Solaire. Essential for those long (2 day) hot (largely overcast) Airdrie summers. Also doubled up as emergency cooking oil and a WD 40 substitute. One bottle lasted 30 years. For a family of six.

All hail the MD Community 🙏 x

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