Reactions to the Akeidah as Rotten Tomatoes reviews, a thread:
🍅=fresh
✳️=rotten
⭐️=audience review
Avraham Avinu
Be’er Sheva
🍅 16 Nisan 2003
While “Akeidah” goes a bit too hard on the melodrama, ultimately it is a significant theological accomplishment that will leave viewers with questions they will never be able to answer.
Original score: A-
Yitzchak
Be’er Sheva
[Not available for comment. Will be back in about 3 years]
Mamre
Hebron
✳️ 17 Nisan 2003
The writing choices, uninspired performance by Isaac, and the trite ending confirmed my original hunch: “Akeidah” is a waste of Abraham’s talent. I just hope it doesn’t lay waste to an otherwise excellent career.
Efron the Hittite ⭐️
3779 y ago
he had me in the first half, ngl. but what the hell happened at the end there? Y no child sacrifice? What kind of “god” is this? def not one i can get down with. weirdos.
R. Yose b. Zimra
The Talmud Bavli
🍅 14 Marheshvan 4011
Look, it’s a great story. But it doesn’t really flow from the last movie. What if—hear me out here—God only did this to make a point to Satan that Abe is a good egg after all? Now THAT would be cool.
R. Shimon b. Abba
The Talmud Bavli
🍅 7 Tevet 4019
If the earlier tests didn’t convince you that Avraham was the real deal, you will reconsider. A classic performance from the best method actor of this generation.
(Full review on Sanhedrin 89b)
R. Oshaya
Bereishis Rabbah
✳️ 24 Tishri 3962
BOOOORING. Where’s the raging river that washes Avraham away? Where the angels that blind Isaac with their tears? The anime version is gonna be soooo much better (I’m working on it).
Pseudo-Philo ⭐️⭐️⭐️
c. 1900 y ago
It was ok, I guess. Probably would’ve been better if the Director wasn’t so obviously trying to make Avraham relevant again in Heavenwood. The angels are right: the man is past his prime.
Targum Pseudo-Jonathan
🍅 c. 700 CE
The real interesting subplot here is between Isaac and Ishmael, but because the film is so fixated on Abraham, we are only left wondering what could have been.
R. Saadia Gaon
Tafsir Rasag
🍅 October 17, 931
Imagine having so much faith that you know God will resurrect your only son even if you kill him against God’s will. That’s how compelling Avraham’s performance is here.
Rashbam
✳️
What is the point of this ridiculous movie? The only reasonable possibility is that the director was punishing Avraham by making him act in this film. At least there’s no stupid special effects or incest like in the last one.
Rambam
Moreh Nevukhim 3:24
⭐️TOP CRITIC
🍅 November 3, 1190
Abraham’s performance is so gripping, so heart-wrenchingly authentic that it should make you want to sacrifice everything for God. And frankly, that’s the whole point.
Ralbag
🍅 August 21, 1339
Abraham’s convincing portrayal of uncompromising Divine justice, a feat unprecedented in cinematic history, is the most audacious moment of the Director’s career. And ultimately, it is the most important.
R. Isaac Luria
⭐️TOP CRITIC
✳️ March 2, 1567
This film almost makes up for the box-office disaster that was “Cain vs. Abel”, but ultimately falls short.
R. Isaiah Horowitz
Shnei Luchot HaBrit
🍅 January 9, 1613
With this performance, Abraham—the High Priest of Biblical drama— enters the Holy of Holies, and emerges unscathed.
R. Elimelech of Lizensk
Noam Elimelech
🍅 December 28, 1760
We all know how this story ends before it even starts. Even Abraham. What he shows us is there’s meaning in living as if anything can happen, as if the Director can change the script at any moment.
Immanuel Kant
Religion within the Boundaries of Mere Reason
✳️ February 19, 1793
Perhaps the Director should have chosen me for the role. Because Abraham failed to understand the categorical imperative, and violated the idea of morality that I invented.
Søren Kierkegaard
Fear and Trembling
⭐️TOP CRITIC
🍅
Nothing about this knight of faith’s performance is an act. It is the teleological suspension of the ethical in all its glory. Your rabbi will probably quote me on that. And anyhow, you can’t spell Kierkegaard without Akeda!
R. Mordechai Yosef Leiner
Mei Hashiloach
🍅 July 8, 1848
Ultimately, this is a film not about the certainty of the Divine word, but the uncertainty of our interpretation of it. The heroism of Abraham is that he embraces that uncertainty.
R. Avraham Yitzchak Kook
🍅 June 4, 1923
Abraham had to truly lose himself for this role. And yet that is precisely why this film is the pinnacle of his career.
R. Klonimus Kalman Shapira
Warsaw
✳️ 1940
“Akeda” is a story about God asking too much of human beings. It is not Abraham who is the hero of this story, but Sarah, whose death is a protest against needless suffering, and Isaac, who sacrifices himself to spare his descendants.
Martin Buber
On the Suspension of the Ethical
🍅 1957
Abraham’s challenge was not to heed the Divine command. It was to understand that a Director who loved him would never allow him to act in a horror film.
Prof. Yeshayahu Lebowitz
Judaism, Human Values, and the Jewish State
🍅 1991
What Kierkegaard said.
Rabbi Joseph B. Soloveitchik
On Repentance
🍅
Also what Kierkegaard said. But like also religious catharsis and stuff.
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And if you think the program you went on (or work for) is immune to this kind of abuse and gaslighting because there’s no creepy guy on staff, think again. The power imbalance on these “future leaders” programs is a feature, not a bug.
Many, if not most, adolescents have a hard time wrapping their head around complex philosophical and sociopolitical issues without taking a emotion-driven hardline stance, no matter how smart they are. It’s a developmental thing, not an intelligence thing. urmc.rochester.edu/encyclopedia/c…
This is why teenagers tend to love grand unified theories and simplistic explanations of things. It allows them to sidestep the complexity of reality, which they generally try to avoid because they don’t need more confusing and dissonant emotions than they already have.
thesis: life evolved/created to be progressively better at keeping time. the human body is the most advanced chronological device, with a resolution of 330 billion time units/day (# of cell divisions). it has cyclical (skin, menses, sleep) and linear (brain, telomeres) clocks.
Using Jewish thought’s 4 categories of the natural world:
🪨inanimate: stays the same forever
🌱plant: grows fast when young, then stays largely the same for a very long time
🐒animal: similar lifecycle to humans but no semiotic memory or free will, so limited ability to change
This can also be measured by the relative difficulty of determining age:
🪨: nearly impossible to determine age
🌱: once mature, very difficult except if you kill it to count tree rings
🐒: difficult to determine except in early and late life
👥: extremely easy—just ask for bday
Sukkos is my favorite Jewish holiday, and there are a lot of annoying myths about it that go around because the Torah is fairly opaque about what it is, so here’s the first of what will hopefully be a few Sukkos mythbusting threads:
1/14
⛺️🌴🍋☘️🌿
Myth #1: There isn’t actually a good reason to celebrate Sukkos now. According to 14th cent. halakhist R. Yaakov ben Asher, compiler of the code known as the Tur, we really should celebrate at Passover time, but we want to show everyone that we sit outside even when it’s rainy.
Truth #1: THE TORAH LITERALLY CALLS IT THE HARVEST FESTIVAL. In the eastern Mediterranean, harvest season is after the summer. And contra Tur, even the Talmud says the rainy season doesn’t really start until after Sukkos. So yes, there is a good reason why Sukkos is now.
Just spent an uncomfortably long time choosing an esrog for the first time in a while (my dad usually gets handed one at random from my hometown shul). Is there a way to do it that’s not neurotic and/or selfish? Why do *I* deserve the nicest-looking/most mehudar esrog, not you?
I actually much prefer when I don’t get to choose—it feels like G!d chooses for me and then it becomes an exercise in acceptance of both my esrog and myself, blemishes and all. And when I choose I feel obligated to choose halakhic hiddur over physical beauty, which is weird.
why does the Talmud conceive of hiddur, which loosely translates to beauty, as comprising a set of rigid, “objective” characteristics, other than because the law by definition must aspire to some form of objectivity? why not leave beauty in the eye of the esrog-beholder?
Thursday was Chai Elul (18 Elul), said (in Chabad sources) to be the birthday of the Baal Shem Tov, founder of the Chasidic movement. A lot of his teachings--brief but pithy--remind me of tweets. Here's 18 of them that can teach us how to be better on this website:
🧵(1/52)
But first: who was the Besht, and why does the environment he was born in remind me of Twitter? Born to Eliezer and Sara in the village of Okopy, near the border of present-day Poland and Belarus, little Yisroel was orphaned at the age of 5.
He was born in a time of upheaval in European Jewry. The Chmielnicki pogroms of 1648-9 had killed 100,000 Jews, or ~30% of Poland's Jews. Shabtai Tzvi's failure left many followers disillusioned with Judaism or following new "messiah" Jacob Frank.
For the 15th of Av, the Jewish holiday of love, and to respond to controversy about how #MyUnorthodoxLife presents the Jewish approach towards sex, a thread of 15 times Judaism is sex-positive, and 15 times it's sex-negative.
Because it's 15 times more complicated than you think.
Note: I am not going to use anatomically correct language here, but that's not because I'm sex-negative (or that anyone who chooses not to is sex-negative). I just want to be sensitive to some of my followers and others who will see this who feel uncomfortable.
Another note: this thread is heteronormative because the Torah is almost entirely heteronormative and sex-negative about queer sexuality. Reply to this tweet with Torah about queer sex-positivity! (Do not reply to argue with me on the Torah's view of queer people; I will block.)