1/ THREAD: To be clear, Rep. Lauren Boebert did not apologize to Rep. Ilhan Omar. A 'Twitter apology' is NOT an apology. Boebert's was a weak pseudo-apology.
2/ A true apology requires much more. And what Boebert did and said were no simple mistakes — Boebert's acts of malice and racism were deliberate and planned.
3/ Components of a Sincere Apology:
• An apology must always be given by the person who committed the act in question - not by a manager, an attorney, a press secretary - or other surrogates.
• An apology must always be given by the person who committed the act in question - not by a manager, an attorney, a press secretary - or other surrogates.
4/ • An apology must never be scripted/written ahead of time (neither by the person apologizing or by their attorney, or some other third party) — but an apology must be spoken, unscripted, from the heart.
5/ • Reading from a script is not an apology — it's just reading — and if there is any emotion, it's often feigned.
Neither is tweeting an 'apology' a true apology — or posting it on a website, newspaper, etc.
Neither is tweeting an 'apology' a true apology — or posting it on a website, newspaper, etc.
6/ • An apology to the public should be given live — with press access. This is particularly true with a person holding public office. While some substitute this with a prerecorded video-audio format — this MO is a deliberate attempt at control and is considerably less sincere.
7/ • At such public apologies, there should be no other subjects discussed, unless, of course, there is an ongoing emergency.
8/ • A public apology to a surrogate or group is never be a substitute for also apologizing directly the person to whom the apology is owed, face-to-face. Sometimes (often) both of these public and private apologies must be given.
9/ • An apology must be accompanied by clear acknowledgement of responsibility.
10/ • A sincere commitment to change must be made with any apology — so as to prevent further infractions.
11/ • An apology must include a specific repair offering (which should also include an asking, "What would you have me do to help make amends?")
12/ • Asking for forgiveness is required with an apology (i.e., Saying, "I'm sorry", while required — is incomplete. One must ALSO say, "Please forgive me", or "In time, I hope you will find it in your heart to forgive me", etc., or similar.
13/ • Regret must be expressed with an apology — "I very much regret what I did to you".
14/ • The vocal qualities (tone, cadence, volume, etc.) of an apology must be congruent with sincerity.
15/ • The facial nonverbal signals and other body language displays accompanying any apology must be sincere.
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