Thread by @youngestpeso

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the $ETH DeFi Tier List. I might do another depending on my motivation. Here is a thread explaining my reasoning for each pick. As always, this is financial advice

1inch tier: We have $Cream, this project is honestly cat shit, I personally view their TVL as the prize pool of the DeFi Hack Olympics. 4 hacks, and this thing is still kicking, either a testament to its resilience or how retarded its investors are. $10 EOY

1inch tier: #1inch is trash scum, their devs are shady their dex is the worst aggregator. I personally view it as the $EOS of DeFi. Their token distribution is shadier than $BSV I would stay away at all costs. sub $1 EOY

C tier: $RGT, I support child labor but they basically just forked $Cream. A fork of cat shit is still cat shit, devs are better and they have @Tetranode backing so that is bullish as well. I don't like the product but I wouldn't be surprised to see the price fly. ~$30 EOY

C tier: $UNI, I can't complain about governance since it doesn't govern and I can't complain about revenue share since it does that either. $UNI is a fork of Bancor and I hope @haydenzadams blocks me for saying the truth. Have fun getting dumped on by VCs with this trash $12 EOY

B tier: $OHM I fuck with the vision, the people's Ponzi. Olympus pro is underwhelming but who cares since we're (3,3) making more than a doctor's salary sitting on our asses jacking off to hentai all day long. Price doesn't matter since the longer you hold the more you get.

B tier: $Sushi, the creator @NomiChef dumped on his investors as soon as $Sushi got liquidity, based. The comeback arc with world-class ponzinomics straight out of the Asperger's brain of @0xMaki and corruption with @josephdelong make bag holding sushi entertaining. $10 EOY

B tier: $ALCX, self-repaying loans, mic drop. This concept is more unstable than my mental health when I don't hit my Juul. Be mindful that when yields crash during a bear market paying back that loan will take years instead of months. Devs dumped so watch out for that $200 EOY

A tier: $Aave will fuck your wife and you can't do anything to stop it so you might as well watch. I like the logo and I like the devs. But most importantly they are not $Cream so it won't get hacked. I own 1 whole $Aave suggest you do the same

A tier: $CRV I don't know what it does, the web app looks like it was designed when IBM was a market leader in the computer industry. With that said, having locked for 4 years, getting my dick sucked by other DeFi projects for my votes does feel nice. $10 EOY

S tier: $RBN, Ribbon Finance has probably the best logo in DeFi, the sexiest dev @kenchangh, and the highest single-sided ETH apy. I can honestly say that I touch myself to their web UI and when I read their Ribbonomics doc I nutted on the spot. $5 EOY anything below is FUD

S tier: $CVX this is what the $CRV ecosystem needed. My special-ed ass doesn't even know how what 6x5 is but the UI for CVX is simple enough for even me to use and pays me the big bucks. Honestly, they made DAO corruption cool and lucrative. 10/10 would smash $100 EOY

S tier: $YFI, has the most based dev team in DeFi. Their discord has a hentai channel and @bantg is out here enjoying the art, based sir. They are revamping their tokenomics from "dogshit" to "Safemoon" with @AndreCronjeTech physically assaulting any seller, 100k EOY guaranteed

S tier: $Rook, @0x81B pivoted from ASMR youtube to making Ponzi schemes. If he asked me to kill someone I would say yes, if he asked me to carry his children I would say yes. They are about to shit all over @k06a's face and his trash dex. @CryptoMessiah knows but do you, 1k EOY