Brains are weird. I sure can't figure mine out. The depression has been a challenge the last few days. I was so low yesterday and cried for hours. I sat and cried at work this morning. But a picture of a t-shirt made me think of a very kind person, and it made me laugh.
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It amused me so much, I had to send a link to it to the person it made me think of.
And that one silly little thing, and the giggle it causes was enough to lesson the depression by several degrees.
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Tonight I succeeded at being the nice wife, instead of the bitchy one I keep turning into each evening for the past several days.
And yet, at random times, I bust out in tears. It's like I crawl 1/2 out of the dark hole and then slide back in.
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I'll take what I can get, because yesterday I couldn't get even an inch closer to escaping the darkness.
I'm exhausted. I think it's time to turn in for the night.
Sweet Dreams Ya'all.
45 minutes to go. The last time we had this high of sales was March of 2019. Thanks to all of you and your amazing tweets I have emotionally kept it together all day. I have been able to greet every customer in a cheerful way and express confidence they will be ok.
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I gave all the regulars plenty of notice and gave them a very sweet deal on preordering a months of supplies. I then doubled each order at no extra charge.
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Each one also had a pod device and a supply of pods in their bag so if they ever have a late night emergency, they have a backup device. Most of them never new what was in the bag until they got home. SURPISE!
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🧵🧵🧵🧵🧵
It has taken me months, but the good news is I've finally moved past denial. 1/
The bad news is I woke up in full blown anger and I'm a hot mess. I've never handled anger well. Not other people's and not mine. Other people's anger makes me feel fear. I know pain is coming, be it physical or emotional, I know angry people are going to hurt me.
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You'd think after so much experience on the receiving end of people's anger, I'd be better at dealing with my own. Nope, it is a source of failure for me. I either bottle it up and cry, lash out at people, or do and say really stupid things.
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If VLNC helps some people stop smoking, I will be glad to see it. I'm concerned about sending people the wrong message about nicotine. I'm going to park some random thoughts throughout the day in this 🧵, as I work on the @SaferWiki VLN page. safernicotine.wiki/mediawiki/inde…
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2/🧵 fda.gov/media/135146/d…
Some people are concerned when people making the switch from smoking to vaping dual use. What happens if people dual use cigarettes and VLNC? Is smoking less/day a good thing? Is it reducing harm? Some against vaping have said "no".
3/🧵fda.gov/media/135146/d… (page 6)
My concern is sending consumers the wrong message about nicotine. It's not the nicotine that causes death and disease. If someone likes smoking and doesn't want to quit they need to understand that VLNC isn't safer, it's less addictive.
I hate politics. I don't understand politics. Some of my friends love politics, find it fascinating. I don't get that, either. I got asked about politics last night. The person found it shocking that I don't know what it means to be a Democrat or Republican.
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I can't define Liberal, Progressive, Conservative, Libertarian. I don't understand Capitalism vs Socialism.
I have the same struggles with religions.
Politics and Religion are things important to many people. And yet both cause so much division and hate.
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After struggling my whole life to fit in an belong somewhere, you'd think that I'd be all gung ho to get really involved in politics and religion. But I don't/can't.
I find that who I vote for and what I believe are things that are personal to me, ...
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A couple of days ago the pod fell out of my Lux and got lost. Yesterday, I stopped at the shop of my competitor and friend, Vapor North. Melissa smiled as I walked in the door and shouted "Vape Emergency!". She also uses the Lux and gave me the one I use.
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She gave it to me because I couldn't find something that was "just right" and she felt I might like that device. (I love it!). So as I open my wallet to get ready to pay for a pod, she opens the box from her Lux and gives me the spare pod from hers. Would not let me buy one.
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We talked biz for a bit. Her lease is up in March and she's not sure she's going to renew. She knows I'm closing my shop. We share a couple of mutual tears as our hearts break for each other.
I get pissed when I'm called a shill for the tobacco industry...
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