Thread by @gradydoctor

1/
Grady Hospital

Him: "I like the way you look at me."
Me: "Excuse me, sir?"
Him: "I mean. . . I like how your eyes look at me."

His words caught me off guard. I’d only been there a few moments. It seemed misplaced.

Me: "I want to receive that. Tell me what you mean, sir."

2/
Him: "It's like your eyes they look at me like . . . I don't know. Like I'm somebody worth you looking at.”
Me: *listening*
Him: “Like they happy to see me. Do that make sense?"
Me: "I think so."

*silence*

3/
Him: "It’s like, when you came in here, you put your eyes on me and right off they told me. Like you made up your mind even 'fore you came in here. Like, 'So what about what he look like or what stuff he got going on. He worth my time.’ I could tell.”

I kept listening.

4/
Him: "’Cause the eyes? See, they tell a lot. Your mouth could be saying one thang, but the eyes? They gon’ tell on you every time."
Me: *listening*
Him: "Disgusted. Don't approve. Don't care. Don’t believe. In a hurry. All that. You can see it in how they eyes look at you."

5/
Him: "But I like how you look at me. I do."

He held my gaze and emphasized the word “like.”

Me: *sigh* "Thanks, sir. For real."
Him: "I hope you look at all your patients like that. 'Cause sometimes that's all anybody need to feel better."
Me: *tiny nod*

And that was it.

6/
After that, I left his room, stepped into the nearest bathroom and cried. Because that feedback was so unexpectedly kind.

But also because he was someone with medical and social problems I couldn’t fix. At least not today I couldn’t.

7/
Sometimes it feels insurmountable when there are so many things out of our control.

But he reminded me that we do have something to give.

I patted my eyes and stared into them in the mirror for a few moments to try to see what he saw.

And to offer some empathy to myself.

8/
Me: “Hey sis. I’m glad you here.”
Also me: “Me too, sis. Me, too.”

I laughed and shook my head. Then went on back to work.

You know? It’s rough trying to divide not enough by too much. But what if one of the main things someone needed, we had all along?

Hmmm.

9/
And I get it. Optimism can’t fix everything. And these same eyes see all that is wrong or awful. I do.

But.

Not at the expense of seeing what is beautiful. And these fleeting moments with these human beings trusting us to care? They are so beautiful.

Yeah.💛

#grateful