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Feb 16 • 18 tweets • 4 min read
Name the blandest imaginable Dorito’s flavor.

Best answer gets a big thing of white rice.

Please use hashtag

#BlandDoritos
Empty.

#BlandDoritos
Cool Styrofoam.

#BlandDoritos
Spicy Pat Boone.

#BlandDoritos
Bob Dole’s Cream Of Wheat

#BlandDoritos
Eagles Reunion Tour Green Room Catering Table

#BlandDoritos
Crunchless

#BlandDoritos
Presbyterian BBQ

#BlandDoritos
This might be my favorite hashtag, you guys.
Gelatin

#BlandDoritos
Leno Monologue

#BlandDoritos
Well, that was fast.

#BlandDoritos is now the number one trending topic in America, I kid you not.

:)
Sweet Thai Chachi

#BlandDoritos
Gallagher II

#BlandDoritos
Scott Summers Original Recipe

#BlandDoritos
Bag Won’t Open Diet Crunch

#BlandDoritos
Oops! All-Gluten!

#BlandDoritos
PlayStation None

#BlandDoritos

• • •

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More from @GailSimone

Gail Simone Profile picture
Jan 24
We are in a restaurant and the family next to us is talking about a family recipe for Beef Stroganoff and ever one of them, including the children, pronounce it, completely innocently, as ‘Beef Strokin’ Off.’

1/
The first time, it was funny and adorable. Now it hysterical.

The dad said there was NOTHING like his mom’s strokin’ off and that almost killed me.

2/
Help me help help they won’t stop going on about their strokin’ off.

Help.
Read 8 tweets
Gail Simone Profile picture
Jan 23
What movie has been seen by seemingly everyone on Earth except you?

Please use hashtag #IHaveNotSeen
For me, #IHaveNotSeen The Big Lebowski.
Annnnnnd….#IHaveNotSeen is trending. ;)
Read 4 tweets
Gail Simone Profile picture
Jan 16
If weird Evangelical album covers were superhero film posters…

WANDAVISION
BIRDS OF PREY
BLACK WIDOW
Read 16 tweets
Gail Simone Profile picture
Jan 16
I just realized that every Alfred Hitchcock film title sounds like a a Transformer/Decepticon if the series was rebooted by the Game Of Thrones guys,

Try it!
PSYCHO
TOPAZ
Read 17 tweets
Gail Simone Profile picture
Dec 5, 2021
I bet H.R. Geiger’s meat loaf looked like vaginas.
He could have a game show where contestants play for cash prizes by guessing, MEAT LOAF OR VAGINA?
Nsfw Image
Read 8 tweets
Gail Simone Profile picture
Nov 25, 2021
Everyone keeps talking about how the Get Back footage shows a happier Beatles, more like brothers. But the clip I just saw was BRUTAL.

George, clearly anxious and nervous, asks the rest if they would like to hear the new song he just ‘wrote last night.’

1/
The song is ‘I ME MINE’ which, while perhaps not amazing in the big picture, still turned out to be a banger and an album highlight.

But he’s nervous, his voice on it is thin, the odd rhythm changes are a little tentative because he just wrote it…

2/
Only Paul seems to really be paying attention.

John is an absolute douche about it, making jokes about dancing girls and barrel organs.

Then he says this thing, that is just so pointlessly cruel…

4/
Read 7 tweets

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