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Gail Simone

Feb 16 • 18 tweets • 4 min read

Name the blandest imaginable Dorito’s flavor.

Best answer gets a big thing of white rice.

Please use hashtag

#BlandDoritos

Empty.

#BlandDoritos

Cool Styrofoam.

#BlandDoritos

Spicy Pat Boone.

#BlandDoritos

Bob Dole’s Cream Of Wheat

#BlandDoritos

Eagles Reunion Tour Green Room Catering Table

#BlandDoritos

Crunchless

#BlandDoritos

Presbyterian BBQ

#BlandDoritos

This might be my favorite hashtag, you guys.

Gelatin

#BlandDoritos

Leno Monologue

#BlandDoritos

Well, that was fast.

#BlandDoritos is now the number one trending topic in America, I kid you not.

:)

Sweet Thai Chachi

#BlandDoritos

Gallagher II

#BlandDoritos

Scott Summers Original Recipe

#BlandDoritos

Bag Won’t Open Diet Crunch

#BlandDoritos

Oops! All-Gluten!

#BlandDoritos

PlayStation None

#BlandDoritos

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More from @GailSimone

Gail Simone

@GailSimone

Jan 24

We are in a restaurant and the family next to us is talking about a family recipe for Beef Stroganoff and ever one of them, including the children, pronounce it, completely innocently, as ‘Beef Strokin’ Off.’

1/

The first time, it was funny and adorable. Now it hysterical.

The dad said there was NOTHING like his mom’s strokin’ off and that almost killed me.

2/

Help me help help they won’t stop going on about their strokin’ off.

Help.

Read 8 tweets

Gail Simone

@GailSimone

Jan 23

What movie has been seen by seemingly everyone on Earth except you?

Please use hashtag #IHaveNotSeen

For me, #IHaveNotSeen The Big Lebowski.

Annnnnnd….#IHaveNotSeen is trending. ;)

Read 4 tweets

Gail Simone

@GailSimone

Jan 16

If weird Evangelical album covers were superhero film posters…

WANDAVISION

BIRDS OF PREY

BLACK WIDOW

Read 16 tweets

Gail Simone

@GailSimone

Jan 16

I just realized that every Alfred Hitchcock film title sounds like a a Transformer/Decepticon if the series was rebooted by the Game Of Thrones guys,

Try it!

PSYCHO

TOPAZ

Read 17 tweets

Gail Simone

@GailSimone

Dec 5, 2021

I bet H.R. Geiger’s meat loaf looked like vaginas.

He could have a game show where contestants play for cash prizes by guessing, MEAT LOAF OR VAGINA?

Nsfw

Read 8 tweets

Gail Simone

@GailSimone

Nov 25, 2021

Everyone keeps talking about how the Get Back footage shows a happier Beatles, more like brothers. But the clip I just saw was BRUTAL.

George, clearly anxious and nervous, asks the rest if they would like to hear the new song he just ‘wrote last night.’

1/

The song is ‘I ME MINE’ which, while perhaps not amazing in the big picture, still turned out to be a banger and an album highlight.

But he’s nervous, his voice on it is thin, the odd rhythm changes are a little tentative because he just wrote it…

2/

Only Paul seems to really be paying attention.

John is an absolute douche about it, making jokes about dancing girls and barrel organs.

Then he says this thing, that is just so pointlessly cruel…

4/

Read 7 tweets

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