Thread by @tressiemcphd

And there it is. Every hire and every denial in academia comes down to this.

https://twitter.com/cesifoti/status/1494369832791425035

Listen, I’m a nobody in the grand scheme of academic things. But I am a Black woman with — depending on who you ask — a touch of the sight OR keen attention due to trauma. Nothing was more clear to me a few years into the game than this.

Winning or losing was always gonna be zero sum to somebody and if that somebody has any power over you, you will feel it. Your wins can be turned into losses and vice-versa.

I am sure I only know a small corner of the non-elite higherEd world but knowing when I’m a piece in play has saved my Black behind more times than I can recount.

I met many people along the way who saw it all as one big game. I didn’t exactly like that position, even though I understood it. But I also knew that it wasn’t a meritocracy or even a closed status culture. It was…well, whiteness?

Once I got that, I dealt with academia like I do qwhite people. Do with that as you will. Streets is watching.

Anyway, all I ever meant by “the institution cannot love you” was this: whether the institution makes you feel great or horrible, it isn’t about you. Institutions aren’t choosing NOT to love you. They are choosing to reproduce themselves. I’m just a widget.

Recently someone took me to task for suggesting that we should not work to make institutions less hostile. Nothing could be further than the truth of what I meant.

I just don’t know how you can do that hard work if you’re doing it for a reciprocal relationship with an inanimate object. Do you do your best work while loving your abuser? I don’t.

But that could be a me problem.