NEWS ALERT: Tues Feb 22, 2022 @ryanlindley at the desk today.
Coverage of important stories from the day will be added to this thread.
🔺EMERGENCIES ACT EXTENDED. Will now include sweeping powers including if you even look at a truck, your credit score decreases by 100pts.
WORLD DESK:
China sends official correspondence to the UN regarding Russia. Loosely translated, the short but pointed message was "Yo, what's with that guy? I think he's going through some things..."
SPORTS:
Contract talks between Leafs Austin Matthews' moustache and Austin Matthews' nose getting closer to a deal. Officials confident they will come together at some point soon.
WEATHER: with Spring fast approaching, meteorologists predict a cold & precipitation-filled transition back to warm weather because screw us, right? Like, here's some more shit to deal with because you haven't had a shitty enough year. F*ck those guys.
High of +9⁰ or whatever
ASTROLOGY:
Today is Tuesday 2/22/2022.
Your life will not change due to this. You shouldn't change the asshole that you are. In fact, you should be double the dickheadedness today.
Numerology Enthusiast @LochlinCross thinks you should pay a loser tax and buy a lottery ticket.
🚨 BREAKING 🚨
Despite the brilliant, eloquent and poignant arguments Dwayne Lich provided to the court on Saturday, Tamara Lich's quest for bail has been DENIED.
Judge found too many gaps in his crooked, rotten story. Reality was far apart from his statements.
BREAKING: @fordnation scraps license plate sticker renewal fees, essentially ending all inflation issues Ontario families are facing.
"$10/month ought to cover that eh? I'm heading back to the cottage now."
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NEWS ALERT: Feb 21, 2022 @ryanlindley at the desk today.
Coverage of important stories from the day will be added to this thread.
🔺Gov. General of Canada announces new "Non-confidence" voting tools including likes/retweets, Facebook "angry face" reactions and chain letters.
🚨 POLICING NEWS:
Police colleges across #Canada will now include comprehensive training modules that include climbing snow bank barricades.
BOOKS:
The Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms has an exciting announcement. An unnamed source reports that @brittlestar
has been approached to narrate, and 'Terry' from Red Deer will offer interpretative commentary.
Hi friends. Court about to reconvene.
If you need to pee, do it now. I'm not stopping this car until we get there.
In the statements prior to the break, the 1st Amendment and War Measures Act were brought up by Mr. Lich (proposed surety.) Lawyers we spoke with don't think he will make the cut
Tamara Lich is back in the court room. Four lawyers are defending Lich in the civil action. They are not revealing the name on the record who offered to drive them back to AB.