Thread by @EdMcDonaldTFK

A pizza anecdote.
One time last year I was out with friends celebrating a sword fighting scholarship, and after I got home at 3am I wanted a pizza. So I ordered while in the taxi on the way home, and the 1st said it wouldn't deliver until 4am. This would not do. 🍕
#pizza
1/10

I'd ordered a pepperoni pizza and wings along with a coke but honestly an hour delivery time, at this hour?!? So I cancelled the order and got the confirmation. I then set about ordering from somewhere else when I got home.
2/10

Living in London there are loads of late night pizzerias on a Saturday night. So I found one, and in a moment of whimsy ordered some ice cream too, but the time it had taken me to do this meant that this one wouldn't arrive until 3:45, but it was now 3:20 anyway
3/10

By 4am nothing had arrived and I was yawning. I called the pizza place, was told it was on its way. Finally, the door went at 4:20. The delivery guy apologised profusely: It was just his small business, and he was so ashamed. I waved him away, by now only wanting bed.
4/10

But as I blearily headed upstairs with my pizza, I realised this was a pepperoni pizza, with wings and where was my ice cream? This was not my order. It was my first order, for which I had already been refunded. Which meant I had another pizza on the way too.
5/10

I ate 2 slices of bad pizza and by then I really was done. It was 4:45am. I went to bed.
BZZZZ went the door at 5:30, waking me up. I ignored it and hoped they'd go away.
Then my phone began to ring.
6/10

The delivery guy wanted to give me my pizza. I told him I didn't want it anymore, and bearing in mind it was 6 flights of stairs down to the front door at 5:30am, he could just take it away. He told me he had brought me free pizzas to make up for it being late...
7/10

The next morning, I was sleeping late and got a call from the neighbour at midday. "Have you ordered pizza?" I go down and on the doorstep the guy has left 7 extra large pizzas, 3 boxes of wings, and 9 garlic breads on the communal doorstep.
8/10

Although the pizzeria failed to deliver them on time, you have to admire the gumption of just sending all your leftover 5:30am pizza in the hope of dodging a 1 star review on an app, like I was gonna wake up at 5:30 and say "IT IS TIME TO FEAST"
9/10

Also have to wonder what kind of party would need 7 extra large pizzas and 11 garlic breads in place of just 1 pizza. It all went in the bin, having been rained on for 6 hours.
I never did get my ice cream.
10/10