Thread by @garwboy

Right, following on from this thread about #IntrusuveThoughts, a lot of people have commented about embarrassing memories that pop up out of the blue and make them cringe all over again.

That's a different, if related, phenomenon. Here's my understanding of why it happens

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https://twitter.com/garwboy/status/1512547386438078480

First and foremost, it's important to recognise that the fundamentals of the human brain's memory system were laid down looooong ago. Before we were even human. Consciousness and rational thought are far more recent developments, evolutionary-speaking

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One upshot of this is that our memory system is often the result of new software running on old hardware.

A lot of the brain is like this, in fairness, and it causes a lot of issues. I *may* have written a book all about it

amazon.co.uk/Idiot-Brain-Ne…

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This is relevant here because, while we now have the capacity to consciously and logically recognise which information we take in is objectively important, our brain's memory system doesn't work that way. It's more 'old school'.

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Ultimately, our brain's memory system decides which memories are more important, and worth keeping and reinforcing, via a range of factors, but one particularly important one is *emotion*

The more emotionally stimulating an experience is, the better our brains remember it

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That is how it seems to work for the vast majority of other species in fairness.

It also explains why we can spend weeks cramming abstract info for an exam and promptly forget it once we've passed, but an awkward teenage faux pas will stay with us forever

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So, emotional experiences, particularly those from our teens (when we're mature enough to have a robust sense of self but our emotions are especially powerful because of how our brains mature), remain vivid pretty much forever.

As most people will recognise.

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Why would they keep popping up, seemingly at random, decades later?

Well, there are lots of possible factors behind this

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One is that powerful emotional experiences need to be 'processed'. The memories of them need to be effectively integrated into our existing mental state, and the neurological systems that support it. Otherwise they sit there, triggering feelings, causing disruption.

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The thing is though, the neurological systems behind emotions are eye-wateringly complicated and still very imperfectly understood.

But one thing that seems undeniable is that our brains use the same mechanisms to produce emotions as it does to process them.

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Put simply; in order to effectively work through and 'neutralise' emotional experiences, our brain needs to trigger the memory of them, to bring the necessary networks into play

Hence potent emotional memories keep popping up again and again

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But what about when it's years later? Why would an embarrassing memory from our youth, one we should have worked though long ago, randomly rear its ugly head during middle age, when we're just waking down the street, triggering the same feelings all over again?

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Well, lots of potential reasons. One is to do with #intrusiveThoughts, which I wanted on about last night. But basically, it's because our brain is always throwing up hypothetical situations and thoughts, and simulating how they might play out in the real world.

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Because of the new/old mashup that is how our brains work, these hypothetical scenarios and possibilities, when thought about, can trigger real emotional reactions.

This is why we're regularly genuinely by things that *might* happen

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The point of this constant hypothesising is so we're more likely to be prepared to deal with it if our imagined situations come to pass.

But we humans are incredibly social, and regularly surrounded by other humans. And this affects our thinking.

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Social phobias are the most common type of human phobia and anxiety issue. We're instinctively very sensitive to, and thus preoccupied by, being rejected, or otherwise found lacking, by others. It's just how our brains do things.

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The upshot of this is that our brains spend a lot of time and effort on avoiding embarrassment and rejection. So, logically, this should skew what situations we end up daydreaming about as we go about our lives, invariably surrounded by others.

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So, our brains will be predisposed to coming up with situations where we could end up being embarrassed, and this can easily lead to them feeling genuine embarrassment.

This is where the memory system gets involved again.

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Because of how much it has to deal with, the human memory system is impressively flexible, and surprisingly frugal (as far as we can tell at present, anyway).

One upshot of this is that the same memory 'element' is used for multiple memories, whenever it's relevant.

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And due to the complex networked structure of memory, triggering an element of one memory can mean other memories which share that element are activated.
So, experiencing a potent emotion means existing memories which involve that emotion may also be recalled

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So, if your brain is regularly preoccupied with avoiding embarrassment (which most will be), it ups the odds of triggering memories where that is a potent aspect. Most of which will stem from our teens, for obvious reasons

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So yeah, a combination of how our brains form memories and they figure out the world around us means cringe-inducing memories have a greater chance of being triggered, often without us consciously realising it's happening

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Heck, it might even be something we've evolved to do, like our subconscious brain's method of aversion therapy. Maybe it's saying:

"Oh, thinking of doing something embarrassing? Remember that time we were really embarrassed? Here's the memory. Look at it. LOOK AT IT!"

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Doesn't have to be embarrassing memories. Imagined injustices trigger angry memories. Thinking of a sad outcome triggers many sad memories etc.

People asked about embarrassing memories though, and I think we're particularly prone to those, for reasons explained.

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As ever, this sort of #Brainstuff is detailed in more depth in my books, e.g. my latest one

amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/178335…

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Granted, the existing data is by no means 100% robust and certain. All I've said is just my best effort at a realistic explanation

I'm a neuroscientist of 20+ years experience with a PhD in how the brain recalls memories, though. So I'd argue it probably has some merit.

/end

This from last night, my attempt to explain the regular phenomenon of random out-of-the-blue embarrassing memories.

#Brainstuff #memories #cringe #psychology

https://twitter.com/garwboy/status/1512889758229352458