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May 14 • 6 tweets • 2 min read
A #CATURDAY THREAD

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More from @Dreamweasel

Dreamweasel Profile picture
May 15
D: How can Republicans support Trump’s attempted insurrection of the American Presidency

R: That is a mainstream media lie, which we will fervently deny is true while voting for Trump in 2024 and supporting other pro-insurgency Republicans
D: How can Republicans support white nationalist propaganda like the Great Replacement Theory

R: That is a mainstream media lie, which we will fervently deny is true while enthusiastically supporting Tucker Carlson and other viciously anti-immigrant demagoguery
D: How can Republicans support a Christian fundamentalist theocracy

R: That is a mainstream media lie, which we will fervently deny is true while passing multiple laws criminalizing abortion and sexual identities that we consider deviant
Read 4 tweets
Dreamweasel Profile picture
May 15
The Republicans are the party of white nationalism. They are grooming angry white radicals to pick up guns and attack the rest of us.

As they continue down this path, there will only be more of this.
The Party of Lincoln is dead. The GOP is now the Party of Donald Trump & Tucker Carlson & Marjorie Taylor Greene & Steve Bannon & Lauren Boebert & Matt Gaetz & Stephen Miller. Just a bunch of vicious, angry racists who’d blow the country up rather than cede instutitional power.
U: I’m just not happy with the job market or gas prices right now

R: Have you considered voting for the Vicious Angry Racists Who Would Blow the Country Up Rather Than Cede Institutional Power?

U: Sounds iffy. But as an undecided voter, I am extremely fickle & impatient
Read 6 tweets
Dreamweasel Profile picture
May 14
MORE FUN WITH CONSERVATIVE PEDANTS

R: Your analogy comparing abortion rights to purse-snatching is flawed, because we treat the sanctity of human life very differently than personal property

D: Do you also respect the sanctity of unarmed black men shot by the police

R: Shut up
D: We’re in a constant in a tug-of-war between policies most Americans want & policies most Americans don’t want

R: You fail to recognize that the only true measure of fairness is that the minority gets their way roughly half the time, no matter what their views happen to be
R: Polls indicate that the majority wants abortion to be legal, but rather than submit to liberal tyranny it’s only fair that the conservative minority gets to make it illegal for a while

D: Would that also apply to a liberal minority

R: WTF do you think

D: Just checking
Read 8 tweets
Dreamweasel Profile picture
May 11
(Five men are caught stealing a woman’s purse)

D: (rushes gang) HEY! Give that back

GANG: She lost, fair & square!

R: Democrats have no respect for the process

FOX: Again with the leftist rioting & looting

GANG: Can we have some additional security, please

SENATE: Done
CARLSON: Are the unhinged Democrats out of control?

McCONNELL: Those five men were just following the time-honored judicial tradition of Finders/Keepers vs. Losers/Weepers

HANNITY: THE DEMOCRATS WANT TO DEFUND THE POLICE!!!
R: Democrats should realize that elections have consequences

D: So why are so many of the consequences the exact opposite of what people voted for

R: Because the battle lines are between ruthless authoritarians & overly-cautious pacifists

WOMAN: Can I have my purse back

R: No
Read 9 tweets
Dreamweasel Profile picture
May 9
To all supporters of the Supreme Court decision who are appalled by the uncouth protests of outraged liberals:

What. The. Fuck. Did. You. THINK. Would. Happen?
The right to abortion is being STOLEN from us.

These individual Justices are pawns of Mitch McConnell & the Federalist Society.

If you’re caught stealing red-handed, don’t be surprised when your victim chases you down and demands their property back.
Donald Trump doesn’t give a shit about abortion. He’s probably paid for more abortions than the entire Democratic Congress combined.

But he was the facilitator for the Federalist Society. It was his grand bargain for the undying support of the GOP’s evangelical base.
Read 5 tweets
Dreamweasel Profile picture
May 8
GOP: We blocked Garland because fuck Democrats and we appointed Barrett because fuck Democrats and SCOTUS is going to overturn Roe because fuck Democrats

FOX: Angry protesters are congregating in front of Justices’ houses

GOP: Don’t the Democrats have any respect for protocol
R: But if our SCOTUS Justices feel threatened, then how are they supposed to “interpret the Constitution” in any damn way they see fit without worrying if they’ll receive pushback from the people whose lives are affected in very real ways

D: Were those air quotes around…

R: No
R: We will never submit to mob rule

D: Sometimes a response is necessary for a small unelected group of authoritarians who seek to retract a wildly popular civil liberty we’ve had for 50 years for no reason other than they goddamned felt like it

R: Help! The mob is after us
Read 6 tweets

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