Sir Alex Ferguson was feared for his "absolutely terrifying" outbursts at Man United.
But you can't blame him: his squad was packed with incurable shaggers and absolute wrong'uns.
From cocaine benders to cross-dressing orgies, meet the maddest and baddest of the Fergie era...
Mark Bosnich, GK
With a cocaine habit that reached 10 grams a day, the Aussie stopper managed just 26 games for United.
An infamous stag night bender saw Bozza wake up in jail on his wedding day, after robbing a photographer outside a strip club.
Wrong'un rating: 8/10
Martin Edwards, CEO
At the '96 end-of-season party, the club assigned their Chairman a minder as "his visits to the ladies are becoming more frequent".
He eventually got a police caution for peering under cubicle doors, and resigned soon after.
Wrong'un rating: 9/10
Phil Bardsley, RB
The Scottish defender came up through United's academy, briefly breaking into the first team in 2003.
It's fair to say the success went to his head... here he is bathing in £50 notes on a grotty casino floor.
Wrong'un rating: 5/10
Wayne Rooney, ST
You could write a book on Wazza's exploits, from knobbing grannies to spiking teammates with Viagra.
But our favourite is the letter he left for a £140 prostitute:
“To Charlotte, I shagged U on 28 Dec, loads of love, Wayne Rooney.”
Wrong'un rating: 8/10
Ryan Giggs, LM
"Is Ryan Giggs the last good man in Premier League football?" asked The Guardian back in 2010.
Not if you ask his brother Rhodri...
Ryan was secretly knobbing Rhod's missus for 8 years, before the press caught him with his pants down.
Wrong'un rating: 9/10
But Rhodri had the last laugh, starring in a brilliantly catty advert for Paddy Power, entitled "Loyalty is dead, live for rewards."
Noman Whiteside, CM
After a night on the sauce, Big Norm came up with an ingenious ploy to avoid police: he'd nurse his Ford Cortina home at a glacial 15mph.
But his plan came crashing down when he was pulled over at a snail's pace on the M60 motorway.
Wrong'un rating: 5/10
Kleberson, RM
United eventually signed the 24-year-old midfielder in 2003.
They tried to get him the summer before, but Klebbers chose to stay another year in Brazil so he could marry his 15-year-old fianceé when she turned legal.
Wrong'un rating: 8/10
Ashley Young, LB
Not exactly a wrong'un, but there's a convincing case to be made that Ash is a pathological liar...
Despite overwhelming video evidence, the defender refuses to admit that a bird pooed in his mouth during a match.
Wrong'un rating: 1/10
Rio Ferdinand, CB
Rio always seems like a decent bloke, but he did himself no favours when he copped an 8 month ban for skipping a drug test to go shopping.
And then there's the time he called DJ Chris Moyles a "faggot" live on Radio 1...
Wrong'un rating: 4/10
Cantona, CAM
Need we say any more?
Wrong'un rating: 8/10
Laurent Blanc, CB
Not many skeletons in his closet, but he is a patronising old git. Just ask journalist Johanna Franden.
"Women talking tactics, it’s so beautiful," Lozza chuckled, before asking her softly "You know what 4-3-3 means, don’t you?"
Wrong'un rating: 4/10
Dwight Yorke, ST
The Trinidadian striker was an absolute shagger.
He filmed a sex tape with Mark Bosnich, dressing up as women and dancing round the bedroom during an orgy with 4 girls.
Unfortunately for Dwight, the tabloids found the tape in his bins.
Wrong'un rating: 5/10
Alex Ferguson, Manager
Fergie was famed for his vicious bollockings, but he was capable of the odd kind word.
Asked about Dion Dublin's famously large penis, he replied: "It's magnificent. I've seen some whoppers in my time, but Dion's is something else."
Wrong'un rating: 1/10
We can't promise Fergie's schlong ratings or Dwight Yorke in a tutu, but we cover all football's wildest stories in our free weekly email.
It's a 3 minute rundown of all the funniest stories in sport.
Eric Cantona raised hell in the Premier League. But that was only Part 2 of his utterly mental career.
After punching teammates, decking fans, and insulting the nation, 'King Eric' left France in disgrace at 25.
Here's the little-known tale of how it all unravelled...
Our story begins in the mountainous foothills of Marseille, where Eric Cantona is raised in a cave. Literally - his parents built their home inside a prehistoric cavern.
A precocious street footballer, Eric signs for Auxerre in his teens.
And that's where the trouble starts.
Aged 18, Cantona makes his debut in a cup tie against 4th tier Cournon, who kick him from pillar to post.
Eventually, he cracks and punches an opponent, somehow avoiding a red card.
At full-time, a group of Cournon players are waiting for him outside the dressing room...
The legendary gaffer scrapped with his own fans, and once lamped Roy Keane in the face for giving away the ball.
But the time he locked horns with famous headcase Vinnie Jones is even better...
New boys Wimbledon arrived in the Premier League with a reputation for trouble.
And when they rocked up at Clough's Nottingham Forest, they brought with them the latest in obnoxious audio technology: a fully specced out Ghetto Blaster.
Dennis Wise, Dave Beasant, and John Fashanu rolled off the coach, followed by hardman captain Vinnie Jones, who emerged with the thumping speaker hoisted on his shoulder.
The Crazy Gang barged past the startled ground staff and marched to the dressing room.
Novak Djokovic spent last January handcuffed to a radiator, eating maggot-infested salads in an Australian hotel prison.
It's a far cry from his triumphant return to Melbourne this morning.
From topless dancers to talking dogs, this is the story of Novak's nightmare Down Under.
Djokovic has always harboured some exotic beliefs.
According to the Guardian, he believes humans can control objects and send messages with their minds.
He opposes surgery and cried for three days in 2018 after having an elbow operation because he had "failed himself".
We also once heard a rumour that he and his wife set places at dinner for their dogs.
The two labradoodles supposedly join the Djokovic family for dinner every night, sitting on chairs and eating from bowls on the table like they are people.
From burning effigies to severed pigs heads, it's fair to say Luis Figo's move to Real Madrid didn't go down well with Barcelona fans.
After Barca's soulless win over Madrid in Saudi last night, here's a reminder of what El Clasico really means.
Rewind, to the year 2000...
The new millennium dawned with the Portuguese maestro a Nou Camp hero, after five successful seasons in Catalonia.
But that all changed in the summer of 2000, when Figo crossed the trenches to sign for arch rivals Real Madrid for a world record fee.
Before his first game at Barca, the Catalan press announced "a traitor is coming", and Figo was greeted at the airport by fans with burning effigies and banners reading "scum" and "Judas".
He avoided taking corners as the noise reached 112 decibels - the level of a jet engine.