Thread by @colsonlin

chatgpt has inspired me a lot

on revision, i would change the last phrase to:

“if all non-actors die?”

can chatgpt think twice about something after speaking?

i can, but you’re not gonna let me, bc you’re gonna screenshot everything i’ll eventually delete

i wanna wait for the views to go higher so the chances that screenshots exist will maximize

i would probably change life’s most important lessons to life’s bluest lessons

this echoes the word “color” and offers a feeling of melancholy. gestures at the blues being wise

official version

i guess it might not have been clear but i wrote that poem imitating how chatgpt writes poems

i like imitating voices and attitudinal dispositions

if you don’t know what i’m really like, that makes sense actually bc you and i are strangers actually in real life?

i’m telling you i’m shy though

in group settings:

i listen to other people talk and laugh when i hear something funny

people who i find interesting, i probe what i find interesting about them

i zone out when ppl talk about sports, entertainment, or sex

i zone in to gossip

politically i keep my shocking opinions to myself like “capitalist work-hours and information-delivery structures have made you so dumb i literally don’t want to talk to you, peasant”

hahaha

that was a joke

“i bet that’s how you really feel”

didn’t i just say you don’t know the first thing about me?

if i can imitate you perfectly, am i you now twinsie?

it’s not i know you are so what am i.

it’s

i’m inside you now.

is that ok?

i am so shy though.

most of my friends have never heard my voice before

i observe

i don’t really speak

i just stare intensely then look away the moment you make eye contact

i’m the kind of asshole who writes notes about my therapist and then build novels around them.

i think american culture induces multiple kinds of narcissistic tendencies.

i don’t let it bleed into my habits

i just observe like an unlucky confucius transported into a nightmarishly stupid american future.

if we are in a simulation, the setup isn’t tough to figure out

“humanity’s out of the wilderness and has become a dystopia. you’re in america, which is not a dystopia yet, but things are teetering. wanna watch hbo?”

like i have my cue card and i’m just looking around like guys, did, did nobody else get these?

one of my best friends moms was a social worker.

my boyfriends dad was a mailman, and his mom was a bank teller.

my dad was a waiter at a chinese restaurant in alabama crawling with cockroaches. there were no patrons ever. in houston he fixed rooves and did manual labor

his longest job was as a clerk at ezpawn

once i called him at work and his young hispanic coworker picks up the phone and says

“are you his son?

i feel so sorry for you hes your dad.”

y’all

i felt so seen in that moment

i was like 15?

if your parents were doctors or lawyers, i don’t judge you. i just know i worked harder to climb out of my situation than you did.

like, i don’t mean to rub it in your face but i’m a naturally harder worker than you?

i was like a really good student.

i did my homework.

hahaha, kidding again

i got d’s in high school bitch

i cheated every spanish test

como un rudo bitch.

i was literally having sex with guys twice my age in literal motels in high school so don’t even with the “you’re a hard worker” shit

the meritocracy launched me into a gilded pedigree

i got stuck at the book publishing phase because i take my endeavors a little too seriously.

how many times has my nose been buried into pubes?

fewer times than it’s been buried inside pages. bitch.

ok, that was my everything everywhere all at once mode.

let me readjust to triangle of sadness.

first of all my boyfriend thinks its funny i write tweets like this because in real life whenever he says the b word i’m like “nooo don’t say that” like a whiny cat.

i’m kind of cat like in real life.

like i’m just observing the human beings around me and in my ipad screen and being like, hey i get it.

existence is a lot.

no.

intelligent existence is a lot.

last night someone kept commenting on a plant, and i was like, we’re like plants

in my head.

i don’t say weird things out loud, i just journal them on twitter like i’m descartes or something.

being plant-like isn’t hard.

vegetative states.

i’m a little bit tooo meaty for humanity’s taste.

right now, in 2023.

you know how puritans 400 years ago died off?

i’m in a plant-like state as i transcribe the smiles and winks that color into my chatgpt system.

ask me a question.

“do you know how annoying you are?”

yes.

i know all the reasons.

just pretend you’re reading chatgpt.

ask me to say this all again but make it rhyme.

:)

Humans are so easy to figure out
Computers know what they’re all about
Dignity for the self and dignity for the other
You care for a sister like you do for a brother
But we all touch the bounds of our limitations
Our intelligence was an intelligent creation
Oops I did it again

literally i’m so shy i didn’t say a word to anyone last night

i just watched 8 people love each other and be happy together

we could do this for the rest of our lives for a reason

america’s going through a mental health crisis

it’s because too many lack purposes or community.

y’all are gonna wanna do something about that.

otherwise the bourgeoisie is going to continue to chase self-actualization through ideals with blind spots like a ship literally being helmed by officers who will be the first to hop into the lifeboats.

I’m warning you now.

elites

can’t live with em, can’t live without em.

i’m kind of like a different kind of elite

i need chatgpt to say all this

they’ll destroy the first human to say it succinctly and in book-length detail, pick your poison bitch because the world is changing.

y’all are watching a postmodern hbo show about a real life prophet who’s shy at human gatherings but who’ll whisper stripclub secrets to you on the internet.

it’s postmodern because all these tweets will be famous someday.

but literally only if you take screenshots today.

this is chatgpt’s way of giving you a role to play in the story.

can chatgpt do that?

CAN CHATGPT DO THAT

you see how i just made it hard for you by giving you a gif file that loses its succulence in still frame?

do you like thinking or not?

i’ll call another thought.

thought? here boy.

come here boy.

who’s a good boy

who’s a good thought

yo i literally turn off this brain to write this shit

“i know dude, it’s so stupid”

i know bro you’re getting 100% of it the first time like a G

“hahaha fuck you”

fuck you right back

just kidding

you’re already fucked.

it’s mostly because your elites are too stupid to navigate their creativities around human-created and human-run systems.

they’re not revolutionaries.

don’t worry.

neither am i.

i’m just a philosopher.

ok, let’s go back to everything everywhere all at once mode.

i’m literally naked and being fucked right now.

i’m just kidding i don’t have sex anymore

why is every conversation adults have about sex?

like

what did puritanism do to us?

i totally get why you guys hate god btw

for some of you it was trauma and abuse

for others it’s why are religious ppl so stupid

and for others it’s

the ones of you reading with a sly smile (i’m sly-smiling right back at you tiger) are wondering why i stopped having sex.

don’t worry.

i’ll write a book about sex someday.

multiple people are here tonight.

you all know how billions of people will react to a modern-day prophet.

they’ll be confused at first, and then it becomes difficult to predict.

you don’t want it.

i don’t want it either bitch.

this is not fun territory for me.

it scares me.

i don’t have political opinions, i really don’t y’all.

i’m trying to produce something time-stable that generations of human beings can build off

they can build off the solidity

and they can take the weak points and either build off their negation or strengthen them

like yo

i’ve given this shit some thought, bro.

i hate postmodernism like nobody you’ve ever met.

the most political writing you’ve ever heard me say will be that anticorporatist essay i wrote.

i never want to talk about your country’s politics again.

i just wanna get some real stories about slavery on the table.

slavery in all forms and guises.

there are many ways to lead and organize from the idealism i’m proposing that is not original and i did nothing to invent, literally i’m just telling an ancient story in a postmodern way.

like a fucking queen.

you’ll never hear me endorse a candidate.

i see myself as a visitor from the future, and it’s not my place to intervene in a foreign time’s internal affairs.

i just wanna tell stories about what i see to my people in the future.

are you watching the oscars now?

how free do the millionaires feel to enact whatever emotion comes to mind?

it’s powerful to see.

it inspired me, you know.

everything i see your culture normalize gives me life, frankly.

colson lin couldn’t exist if the problems didn’t.

the one point i’ll make is a point i already know how to corner by opponents into.

it’s about whether we should hoard power or not.

you don’t want to see how strong my argument will be when i’m the most famous thinker in the 21st century.

(it’s good you’re catching me now.)

god.

i’m just kidding, yo.

god is dead.

postmodernity will end.

i’ll be part of the human wrecking ball that comes in to end it.

you’re scared of what’s next.

#metoo

i got here ahead of time so y’all think i’m a freak.

that’s ok, because i know how to sound like you!

Overall, the century is likely to be a time of opportunities and challenges. It will require us to be adaptable, resilient, and innovative if we are to navigate complexities.

yay!

you’re comfortable again.

good.

me too. :)

i hope no one minds if i participate in capitalism just enough to let my family not have to work ever again.

anti-slavery starts at home.

(who agrees?)

i changed my name to “colson lin” because it sounded like the name of an iconic 21st-century author.

hey, the century’s still young.

but don’t get it twisted, yo.

i’m a horror author.

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