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Still under the weather but regardless, I must solider on for the festival of joy and light - the Eurovision - will soon begin. Oh, I shouldn't drink, I'm in no state to do so but ... well ... what choice is there? How else do you commune with gods of eurovision otherwise?
Eurovision is a religious experience that can only be obtained in an intoxicated state when blurting out half garbled words to songs you don't understand whilst watching images of scantily clad elves with beards catapulted across the screen and squashed between huge LED screens.
Whilst I'm waiting, I may as well get GPT4 to create a new Eurovision language for me and start translating my tweets ... just to get into that Eurovision vibe ... hold my beer, no wait ... I need that beer ...
Storm in a Teacup, but Rise Like a Phoenix, I must Fairytale for the Euphoria - the Eurovision - will soon begin. Oh, Alcohol Is Free, I'm in No Dream Impossible to do so but ... well ... What's Another Year? How else do you Love Shine a Light with gods of Eurovision otherwise?
I'm sure it will all start to make sense later ... after several more beers. The countdown begins. The event horizon that is the Eurovision Song Contest approaches. There is no escape.
Resistance is futile ... or in Eurovision-ese "Hard Rock Hallelujah, You Are The Only One" ... it will make sense later, keep drinking those beers.
And so it begins and it's awesome. UK very proud to host for Ukraine. United by music, all are welcome ... except Russia.
Beautiful voices, dire songs, hilarious sets and oddball gimmicks ... that's #Eurovision at its finest.
However ... cha cha cha ... has to become the anthem for the world. If Finland and his dad bod don't win ... well ... it'll be a crime #Eurovision
X : What did you think?
Me : I listened to the songs whilst managing half a beer and then fell asleep on my favourite settee, all wrapped up in woolen blankets. I woke up fourteen hours later to discover that Finland had won ... well ... they won the only vote that matters.
Me : I listened to the songs whilst managing half a beer and then fell asleep on my favourite settee, all wrapped up in woolen blankets. I woke up fourteen hours later to discover that Finland had won ... well ... they won the only vote that matters.
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