Thread by @mykola

I opened a business checking account using the @QuickBooks web interface when setting up an invoicing service.

They made it seem easy.

I sent my invoice, the client paid that day, great.

Then my money was "received" but not "deposited", apparently. Ok. So I click deposit.

Then it tells me "Great! Depositing your money into your new business checking account! Here's the debit card info, pre-added to the Wallet on your iphone!

bythewayyourdepositwilltakeaweektoclearfornoreasonthankyoubyyyye~"

And like, what? Fuck.

I had to borrow from family.

So the week goes by. Great, ok, it notifies me that my deposit has posted to my account. Wonderful.

I go to send someone some cash using Apple Pay and the transaction is denied. What?

No error. Says I have to call support.

Oh no.

Listen. I am #actuallyAutistic. When you make me call you, and then you put me on hold while you play genuinely painful music through the speaker, for an unbounded amount of time?

That is not "free" for me. That is not even "cheap". That is not always "affordable."

But okay, I did it. And I was put on hold, and made to listen to the music.

Then someone answered and read from a script that determined that the problem was that I had added my debit card to the Apple Wallet incorrectly.

(Note: it auto-added itself.) But ok! Cleared, re-added.

Same problem. No error except "call support". I said, ok, what gives?

They said, well your expiration date is wrong.

I said, it's MM/YY, is that right? They said yes, you must have entered it wrong.

I said. We literally just did this. They insisted I do it again.

Then the transaction failed again. And they started telling me that I had to remove and re-add the card again. (This person is literally following a flow-chart with goldfish brain, almost impressive.)

I said, please let me speak to a manager. They kept talking forever.

Finally they said they'd have someone else reach out within 4 hours.

Ok.

A few hours later someone did. And somehow had me on hold again. And then this person walked me through *the exact same set of steps*.

And I played along. And got the same outcome.

And I said, please. Please. Just escalate this and have someone fix it. I can't eat. I need this money. Please just tell me how to get my money.

And she started talking about the expiration date again and I said no. Have someone email me that this is resolved. And hung up.

This morning I got an email. "Great news, we addressed the problem! Please call the number on the back of your card!"

Fuck that, I tried running it. Still failed. Ok. Called number.

Painful hold music for 20 mins. Short conversation where I repeated the same information again.

Then "please hold" and now this shitty recording of a saxophone is blaring through my phone speaker and I am literally on the verge of a meltdown from this.

You fuckers don't understand.

How can you just do this to me.

And she couldn’t help me.

Had no record of the ticket number I was given last night.

I can’t access my funds and now I’m melting down over this futile fucking interaction.

And this is just "normal". This is how the world is built.

When we say Autism is a disability, this is what we mean.

Literally every single thing I have to do today is going to be harder because of my emotional state.

But there was no other way to even try to address this.

AND IT DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING HELP.

Anyway. Hi, world, I have a question.

I have two checking accounts with two different banks. I have account and routing numbers.

Is there some fast way to move money using account numbers from one bank account to the other?

Preferably without source bank needing to be involved