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#ADHD Advocate. 20 something, Desi Irish guy. He/ him. Problem solver. Advice giver. Other buzzwords. Read my ADHD blogs & ask questions from the site below!
May 6 10 tweets 2 min read
I've hurt or offended quite a lot of people without meaning to.

Most of it was when I was younger, and struggled with self filtering, tact and excitability.

So I eventually stopped talking much out of fear of hurting others.

I've a lot more experience but I'm still anxious. I worry that my words would be misunderstood cause not everyone thinks like I do (or is as open as me).

So I find myself anxiously replaying past conversations, worrying about how something I said could be misunderstood.

It's very draining and makes socializing off putting.
Dec 8, 2021 10 tweets 2 min read
ADHDers are no strangers to failing.

After years of failing, I just avoided doing things.

Why do stuff when we'll just fail?

When everyone around us blames us for not trying hard enough when we were putting our all into it?

When hard work is just rewarded with failure? NT folks equate interest with result.

With hard work with result.

That if you aren't producing output or getting the result you want, you're just not trying hard enough.

And even ND folks can pick up that mindset form NTs around us..

And feel worse about ourselves for it.
Dec 7, 2021 4 tweets 1 min read
When I was younger, I'd fill every second of my existence with distractions so I wouldn't have to feel or think.

I'd wake up, and go on my phone.

Be on my phone for every second of my life.

After uni, I'd go on YouTube. Watch stuff till I passed out at 3 am.

Repeat. I had no active coping strategies so I'd just push the pain away till I stopped remembering it.

Out of sight, out of mind.

If it was especially bad, I'd stop doing everything and spend all day watching stuff to avoid my thoughts.
Mar 13, 2021 9 tweets 2 min read
Say you face some negative emotions.

Rejection, disappointment, failure.. how do you deal with it?

You can use whatever coping strategies you want.. but one step is universal.

Letting yourself feel it. (1/4) Negative emotions suck, especially for us. Even small experiences can be very high and extra painful.

But to deal with it, you gotta let yourself feel it.

I'm currently mourning some failed major plans. Something I was looking forward to a lot.
Mar 13, 2021 13 tweets 3 min read
'Something to look forward to' is genuinely one of best ways to describe a project and how it helps us ADHDers.

I didn't have something to look forward to yesterday and gamed every free second I had to distract from unstimulation.

Today, I have one, and I haven't gamed once. I either need to be doing something at all times or need to have something I'm doing in the future to look forward to.

Former is distraction. Gaming, reading, endless internet scrolling.

Latter is creative. Constructive. Filling.
Mar 12, 2021 7 tweets 2 min read
A few years ago, I would be unable to continue doing anything after doing it for some time.

Many tasks started and abandoned.

So if I started reading a new book, I start hot, read obsessively, but give a few days, I'd read less till I'd be unable to pick it up again. (1/6) I wanted to figure out why.

Sure it made some sense from an effort to reward perspective for some stuff.. but why did I behave the same way for hobbies?

Why did I have so many books and games half consumed? And how could I get around this.
Feb 9, 2021 6 tweets 2 min read
ADHD and anger.

I don't really mention it a lot cause I don't experience too much of it.

But anger is a BIG issue with ADHD.

Negative situations can cause us to collapse inwards and/ or explode outwards.

The former can be a break down.

The latter is often rage. Anger. I feel like ADHDers with anger issues are treated worse.

I can see why.. anger affects others around them directly.

But fuck, they aren't doing it on purpose.

I have seen kids with ADHD explode into fits of rage.

They're not spoilt. It's emotional dysregulation.
Feb 8, 2021 7 tweets 2 min read
There's one quality that is always present in ADHDers who haven't yet or are just learning to cope with their symptoms.

Fragility.

Something negative happens, big or small, and it can cause us to collapse. Just break down.

This is true for EVERYONE at the start. As we learn to cope, we become less fragile. We learn to become more resilient.

Learning to cope is a process.

Imagine trying to get better at talking to people. If you aren't able to handle RSD or self soothe, a single negative interaction can cause you to give up.
Feb 8, 2021 7 tweets 2 min read
Intrusive thoughts are especially scary when you have impulsivity issues too.

I'm still super careful around stairs cause my brain starts wondering how it's be to just hurl myself down them.

My ADHD thinks it's be cool but I disagree. ADHD is like a very young child, who doesn't know how anything works and wants to try it all.

ADHD: 'feel that knife edge, I bet it's super sharp!'

Me: 'it is and it'll cause me to bleed'

ADHD: 'but what if you don't! It'd be cool'

Disaster strikes when I listen to it.
Feb 6, 2021 4 tweets 2 min read
Question for female ADHDers:

How have your experiences/ symptoms differed from what you've read/ heard/ seen about ADHD?

What would you like to tell girls who think they might have ADHD?

#askadhd

(Here's one to start off: hormones can affect symptoms and your ability to cope) Some resources below.

I'd also recommend some female ADHD advocates to follow but like 90% of all ADHD advocates are women, and they're all good.

chadd.org/for-adults/wom…

additudemag.com/gender-differe…
Jan 4, 2021 4 tweets 1 min read
Parents with ADHD kids:

Please understand that there's a difference between knowing and KNOWING (ie, understanding).

ADHDers struggle grasping consequences.

So your kids might know why they shouldn't do something but it doesn't mean they understand the reasoning behind it. I often get questions from parents who say that their kids 'know' that something is bad but they still do it.

I always ask them how they are certain that their kids 'know'.

So your kids might 'know' that they shouldn't leave their toys out but they struggle understanding why.
Dec 12, 2020 5 tweets 1 min read
We ADHDers struggle to realize things.

As in, some things don't easily occur to us.

I wanna say 'we don't notice things' but I feel thats misleading. Its not that simple.

Eg, you say hello to me and I would say hello back.

But it might not occur to me to say hello first. I forgot to eat lunch today.

But see, its not that I actually forgot.

I felt hungry.

It just didnt occur to me to eat to sate my hunger.

Its not that I didn't notice ny hunger. Nor did I forget about food. Nor was I distracted.
Oct 19, 2020 5 tweets 2 min read
One of the first steps in managing your mental health is to learning to recognize your automatic, irrational thought patterns and spirals.

Instead of being dragged along by the emotional wave, learning to keep your head above water, breathe and slowly swim towards the shore. /1 So for me, one of my common spirals was when I faced failure.

I would AUTOMATICALLY (stressed because they start off completely subconscious and automatic) start thinking:

'Of course I failed. I'm a failure after all. This is why I should never try.' /2
Oct 17, 2020 5 tweets 1 min read
ADHDers are incredibly likely to have other diagnoses separate to ADHD. These comorbid conditions, can masks issues, complicating treatment.

When I started managing my depression, my ADHD symptoms 'got worse'. Depression was 'suppressing' my ADHD issues.

butthethingis.com/adhd-and-comor… Hell, I didn't even realize I had ADHD cause of the depression.

It really masked all of my more hyperactive symptoms. No interrupting, no rapid thoughts, no excitability, none of the ADHD chaotic-ness.

Inattentive symptoms were iffy cause depression can cause similar issues.
Aug 1, 2020 5 tweets 1 min read
I had a though.

I've always perceived/ described my meds as helping me focus. But that's not technically true.

It actually makes me much less likely to be distracted.

While the outcome is the same (increases attention), I think the framing is different and more accurate. How we percieve and think about something is massively important as it changes our expectations.

Meds don't fix all of our problems. Saying it helps focus might cause a newly diagnosed ADHDer to think it could.