Every brand needs an origin story, and this is ANNA’s.

Close your eyes (don’t actually close your eyes, or you won’t be able to read the tweets) and let the past come alive. It’s the golden age of 2003 and our hero Pietro Parka is working as an accountant in Luton. Pietro is Luton’s hottest young accountant. It’s a dog eat dog game, and he’s serving piping hot Daschund to the small businesses and freelancers of Britain’s second city (for the purposes of this tweet, let’s pretend Luton is Britain’s second city).

Look online and you’ll find endless advice on what you need to start a small business. But very few websites tell you what you don’t need. So here is ANNA’s list of 10 things you DON'T need to start a #SmallBusiness. 1) A stapler. This is a controversial one, as plenty of people do use staplers to attach two - or sometimes three! - pieces of paper together. But we’ll be blunt: it’s 2020. A stapler is a luxury, not an essential. Think of it as the elderberry of the small business world.

It’s Tuesday. We’re all still in lockdown, so we are going to tell you a story. The story of YOU, in a parallel world in which there is no pandemic. You bound out of bed, full of vim and energy. You wolf down a bowl of Coco Pops and head out of the door with a spring in your step. You’re a go-getter! An achiever! A lover AND a fighter. You swig an energy drink as you run for the bus. You’re a cheetah in the urban jungle.