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Listen. It took me years to realize I stopped auditioning for musical theater not bc I was lazy, but bc I was in pain. It wasnât the rejectionâit was walking into a room & being made to feel like your body was unreasonable, that by showing up you were wasting everyoneâs time.
It was standing in a row with 30 girls in leotards and LaDucas and watching the casting directorâs eyes skip over you as he scanned the line, or mindlessly push your headshot to the rejection pile with without even looking at you long enough to see your face.
It was the urge to walk up to the only other big girl in the holding room & sit in silent camaraderie, while secretly hating she was there. There were only so many âold ladyâ (or âfat friendâ or âclueless teenâ or âsassy villainâ) roles to go around and theyâd never cast you both
