I recently went through a major change, new job and relocating to a new state with little ones in tow. Like many times before, I was called crazy for making these decisions.
I wanted to share a few things about this experience...
The idea that we’re at the mercy of large entities and that we, as individual physicians, are incapable of bringing about change is false. With the right people, leadership, and with the right goals, we are more than capable of advocating for our patients and improving care.
While we stress the importance of continuous system improvement, what we often neglect to talk about is futility as it relates to changing cultures. When you give your all and your efforts are not only not reciprocated but negated, you might have arrived at the point of futility.
As physicians, we’re trained to do everything possible to save our patients. I think we approach process and system improvements the same way and can sometimes be blinded to how fundamentally flawed some of these institutions are.
When I felt like I found myself at the point of futility and made the decision to move on, it occurred to some well-meaning allies that as a mother with a family to consider, it was in my best interest to suck it up and compromise whatever principles I was hanging on to.
When I got on the job market, now with a lot more experience than the last time I interviewed as a fresh graduate, the mere mention of my family resulted in some practices and groups abruptly ending conversations as they wanted someone “willing to work hard.”
It appeared quite odd that on the one hand, motherhood made me a lazy surgeon, but on the other hand, I shouldn’t quit that same position because of the liability of my family. I find it interesting that motherhood in medicine can be weaponized against in so many ways
All in all, my decisions were probably crazy but I believe they were also necessary. I find it hard to be complacent and just go with the flow because “that’s how we do it here.” Nothing changes when we settle for the status quo.
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