Thread by @FlowConFR

There are things you don’t talk about with your colleagues - even less so with your boss. Mental health issues are certainly a big no-no. Are taboos compatible with an #agile #culture?

In this talk, @MlleSophiePofie shares what she’s learned from breaking taboos. #flowcon

“When I first started working as an agile tester, I kept my history with mental illness secret. As a result, I couldn’t speak openly about topics that are close to my heart: mental health and self-care. I didn’t want to seem weak and vulnerable.”

“In the Agile World however, we value respect, courage, and openness. How do you reconcile this with these taboos?
Can you really be courageous and open if you deny a part of yourself?”

“When I attended my first ever testing conference,
I saw the openness with which psychological topics were discussed. Inspired, I came clean to my boss on the very first day upon returning. From then on, I wore my heart on my sleeve.”

LESSON 1: YOU’RE NOT THE ONLY ONE

LESSON 2: OPENNESS INSPIRES OPENNESS.
By sharing your vulnerability you start creating psychological safety for others, and there’s more room for everyone to be themselves.

LESSON 3: OPENNESS IS A HABIT, NOT A CHARACTER TRAIT.
Once you’ve shared one personal thing, talking about other things becomes less difficult.

LESSON 4: SHOWING VULNERABILITY SHOWS STRENGTH.

LESSON 5: SOME PEOPLE JUST DON’T GET IT.
When it comes to mental illness, people don’t apply the same logic as they do for other conditions.

LESSON 6: SOME PEOPLE GET IT REALLY BADLY WRONG.
No, we’re not asking for attention, and we are definitely not flirting when we are sharing those things.

LESSON 7: WHEN PEOPLE WANT TO HELP YOU, LET THEM.
Most humans are kind. Helping people is rewarding. It’s a win-win situation, actually.

LESSON 8: THERE’S STRENGTH IN NUMBERS.
You don’t want to be coping all the time. Everyone is fighting their own battles, create your little group and rely on each other.
If someone needs to talk to you about something, ask them “Do you need to vent or a piece of advice?”

LESSON 9: BLUNTNESS UNCOMPLICATES THINGS.
Just saying things is a relief.

LESSON 10: EVERYBODY SHOULD KNOW THE OXYGEN MASK RULE.
Taking care of your mental heath is part of your responsibility as an adult. If you do not take care of yourself, somebody will have to. So it’s not selfish, it’s a necessity.

Be kind to yourself, to others.

Even before the cost of living crisis, the Ukraine war, Covid… lots of people where/are suffering from mental illness. Odds are you already know someone who suffers from depression.

We need to fight the stigma. Let’s normalize talking abt that.

Last tip to foster sharing and trust: Start by signaling you are ready to listen. Talk about feelings and emotions frequently. Talk openly about your stuff, it will help people reciprocate.