@realDonaldTrump ...And at first the King did say the Plague would blow over like a mighty wind, and that the numbers would shrinketh from 15 to 0, and his apostles did rejoice at this news for the Plague, in their eyes, was just a flu. And so the King did return to his holy golf game.
@realDonaldTrump ...And then the King did proclaim, blessed all the tattoo shops, and massage parlors, and men with shears, and biker gangs, for they know my love. And with a tiny hand and not so outstretched arm he did decree, open back up thy land, so that my his votes might flow.
@realDonaldTrump ...And in a vision from a voice heard throughout the Kingdom, on the holy Fox News, the King did order his flock to go to the top of the mountain and sacrifice their parents and grandparents, for the flock wants its football and Walmart and blessed Chic-fil-A.
@realDonaldTrump ...and the people did rejoice. And the Kind proclaimed that all men, women, beast and fowl across the land should taketh disinfectant from beneath their sinks, and put it into their bodies so that they might know a world with no more Plague. Amen.
