My Authors
Read all threads
Dear Arewa Ladies,
 Today I'll be sharing some advice with the unmarried sisters. To avoid ending in tears you should consider 3 factors before getting into relationships. Although in the end everything is destined to be, we do our best to be safe than sorry
So; CULTURAL DIFFERENCES/FAMILY BACKGROUND, TIMING and AGE GAP. Even though now that I think about it, the subsequent ones both depend on the first. You have to be realistic and honest with yourself. What is your culture like?
What are the expectations that your family has on you? What class are you from? What sort of life are you used to? What's the minimum that your parents expect from someone that wants to marry you?
When you're honest with yourself about these questions and ask them about any guy you're thinking about getting serious with, you save yourself a lot of heartache.
After asking yourselves the questions in the previous paragraph and you're not holding any unrealistic notion that you can change your Baba's mind. You pray about it and you go ahead. As a cautionary tale I'll use my story.
My girlfriend who I believed I was going to marry. Lack of love or understanding was not what broke our relationship. The factors I mentioned were what did. She came from a family that expected her to be married immediately out of university.
But I was still a student then, and she was a few months older than me so how was I going to feed her? How was I going to afford the wedding? (And her culture IS known for throwing extravagant weddings) Let's not even go that far, how was I going to afford the lefe?
WHO was even going to believe that I could do any of that in the foreseeable future? To cut the story short, things crashed and burnt to the ground leaving us in tears. But change any of the factors in the equation and the outcome could have been different.
If her family had been more lenient towards the age she got married, she could've waited for me. If we had met at a different time, if I had been older. The what ifs were limitless and they plagued me. It took me quite a while to get over what happened. But, c'est la vie. We move
And as unromantic as I'm sure all this sounds to you, it is the truth. Believe me I'm talking from experience, I learnt this the hard way. Tell yourself the truth now, we are not white people. We are Arewa people.
Yours sincerely,
Your now sensible Arewa brother.
#ThroughHisEyes #jarumamagazine #Arewa
Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to force a refresh.

Enjoying this thread?

Keep Current with JARUMA Magazine

Profile picture

Stay in touch and get notified when new unrolls are available from this author!

Read all threads

This Thread may be Removed Anytime!

Twitter may remove this content at anytime, convert it as a PDF, save and print for later use!

Try unrolling a thread yourself!

how to unroll video

1) Follow Thread Reader App on Twitter so you can easily mention us!

2) Go to a Twitter thread (series of Tweets by the same owner) and mention us with a keyword "unroll" @threadreaderapp unroll

You can practice here first or read more on our help page!

Follow Us on Twitter!

Did Thread Reader help you today?

Support us! We are indie developers!

This site is made by just two indie developers on a laptop doing marketing, support and development! Read more about the story.

Become a Premium Member ($3.00/month or $30.00/year) and get exclusive features!

Become Premium

Too expensive? Make a small donation by buying us coffee ($5) or help with server cost ($10)

Donate via Paypal Become our Patreon

Thank you for your support!