So. We’ve all got enough toilet roll this time, yes? We’ve practiced our sourdough? Set up for Zoom?

Then please could we remember, as we head towards another spike, that this one is the fault of the same people who locked down too late to properly squash the last one.
Not teens. Not the olds. Not cruisers, or schools, although all of those things do their bit.

Because whatever they did, it would be harmless if the govt a) had functioning test and trace and b) stuck to the rules itself rather than spaffing them all over Barnard Castle.
And considering for the last 3 months this govt has hysterically ordered us to the pub, the coffee shop, local businesses, Primark, restaurants, the gym, and the office, it’s hardly a fucking surprise people have considered those activities safe enough to let their guard down.

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More from @fleetstreetfox

7 Sep
Tomorrow’s Wellygraph is a snapshot on the most extraordinary world. 1/
First, Boris claims the withdrawal agreement HE renegotiated and HE pushed through Parliament twice and HE demanded an election over was, actually, someone else’s. And he didn’t really read it.
Second, all those consequences were literally warned about, by the DUP, Commons, and every newspaper from here to Timbuktu, well before he made sure the withdrawal agreement which he hadn’t read and didn’t negotiate, became law.
Read 7 tweets
18 Jun
This Raab business bothers me. Not the immense stupidity - the man’s got two law degrees, obviously too thick to figure out how to leave school - but it’s the other stuff. 1/
He has plainly asked aloud what this knee business is about. He referred to discussing with his wife whether he went down on one knee to propose. You can picture it - “why are they doing it? Are they proposing?” , “You didn’t when you proposed”, etc 2/
But having questioned it, having found a worldwide symbol of protest and realising he did not know anything about it, he did not Google it. “I appear to be ignorant about a thing, so that’s fine.” That’s terrifying, in and of itself. But. /3
Read 6 tweets
19 Feb
May I tell you a story? It may or may not be relevant. Let's see.
Decades ago as a cub reporter, aged just 18 on my local paper, I was sent to cover an inquest of a man from my patch. I will not go into details, but he'd committed suicide.
His family was known to mine, slightly. This was an occupational hazard, as my 'patch' was, literally, also my patch.
Read 24 tweets
7 Aug 18
I bring news. About 1,000 years ago, when I saw Kate Adie reporting from the collapsing Berlin Wall and told my mum I wanted to be a journalist, she didn't take me seriously.
So she bought me this book as a joke.
I devoured every word. Every. Single. Word.
Read 17 tweets
15 May 18
Royal reporters are a decent bunch trying their best to cover stories where the protagonists refuse to ever say much. But royal *stories* have a life of their own, and here's why /1
The Royals never confirm or deny anything, beyond engagements and birth. So anyone wanting to spin a line or make a buck can do pretty much as they please /2
Friends can tell you Harry was born a girl, courtiers can reveal William has taken up kick-boxing, an insider can say the Queen has stopped going upstairs. All might be true, and all might not. You'll never know /3
Read 21 tweets

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