The famous adman's phone rang. It was his old art partner from decades ago. Kulkarni. Whose every scribble was frameworthy. He could hand-letter almost any font from memory. "32 point Optima bold , 10% condensed?" No problem, he ghe! +
Before it became an entirely useless skill , he could order typesetting that fit his layouts to the t. He would say 'Body copy in 12 point Helvetica, 14 pt leading, left justified as per scribble'. The last full stop would land exactly where his scribble predicted it would. +
He went through tracing pads faster than copywriters ran through their Reynolds. He would read the (not yet) famous adman's copy and say, "Very nice. Can you reduce copy by 15 to 20 words? I am thinking Bernhard will look nice, no? Fred Woodward style madhye karu ya" +
The Studio Manager worshipped him. The studio artists spread stories about the art director's legendary skills. Less proficient art directors would make the artists spend hours cutting and pasting the typesetting with their trusted Bharat blades to match layouts. +
Not Kulkarni. All they had to do was squeeze out the rubber sol, slather it around, slap the bromide on the artwork. Perfectissimo! +
The famous adman dreaded calls from obsolete geniuses. It was always the same story. Old school art had become an unaffordable luxury. Adobe was the new tracing pad. Rotring pens were museum pieces. And mouse-happy dtp boys and girls were popping up like an adolescent rash. +
'Arre bol, Kulky! What a wonderful surprise", the famous adman said, with genuine feeling. Though tinged with a grim anticipation of the conversation to follow. +
To his credit, Kulkarni held out longer than his brethren. First the increments stopped, then the briefs trickled down, then he became part time, and then he was let go. +
"Arre Tim Delaney, kasa kai?". They called each other Tim and Fred. An old inside joke. "Aika na, Tim... I need a small favour.". The famous adman thought, 'Gosh, here it comes. Even before the small talk. "I don't want you to think I'm taking advantage of knowing you...' +
"Tu jaanta hai na, I left advertising ten years back. I really struggled for two years, and then I started a cafe in Goa with my wife. Main socha, I know only two things in life - design and cooking. So let me start a 'designer' cafe.... assats." +
"With Ganpati Bappa's blessings it's doing well. May even open one in Bombay next year... I wanted to do some D&AD type posters to put up on the walls. Main socha Tim Delaney se poochta hoon. Bahut saal se award nahin jeeta... but only if you agree to one condition.." +
The famous adman hadn't felt so stupid in a long time. Kulky continued, "You have to let me pay you. And I won't be like that freelance jeweler client that we worked for in Princess Street. I will pay in advance." He laughed his trademark snorting laugh. +
"By the way, what's the name of your cafe, Kulky?", the adman asked. "I named it after my favourite font... Cafe Caslon." The famous adman smiled. A headline was already forming in his mind.
ANTHE
ANTHE
• • •
Missing some Tweet in this thread? You can try to
force a refresh
