Thread by @thejournalista

Nah, we gotta discuss how Shirley had the audacity to pick up her rotary dial phone, take all that time to dial Barbara's number and confront Barbara about a no good ass man who was probably lying to both of them anyway

Shirley told Barbara that she found her name and number by going through her "old man's pockets."

Already, we know Shirley is insecure as fuck, likely because the nigga has previously given her reason to be. That's problem number one.

Why she playing on Barbara phone instead of confronting that man? If she was going through his pockets, then we know that this wasn't the first time the gentleman in question has had Shirley out here looking like a gotdamn fool.

She then proceeds to tell Barbara that "woman to woman," she thinks it's only fair that she calls her and tells her where she's coming from.

As if Barbara gives a hot fuck. Girl.

I have no idea why Barbara hasn't already hung up at this point, but I can only guess that she is just as messy as Shirley's insecure ass, so maybe they both deserve this trash ass man.

So since Barbara silly ass hasn't hung up on her already, Shirley says "Look sis, I don't know how you going to take this, whether you gonna be cool or come out of a bag on me," and y'all know what that means.

Shirley know she wrong as fuck playing on this woman's phone.

So she's acknowledging that Barbara could rightfully beat her ass (or worse) for calling her with this bullshit.

But Shirley told Barbara she didn't even give a fuck how she took it, really, and y'all

THEM WAS FIGHTING WORDS.

This was 1974, so there was no internet or social media or Google. Barbara probably wanted to pull up on the bitch right then, but she didn't know who she was really or where she lived. So she just sat there and continued to listen to Shirley's bullshit.

it's already clear that Shirley wasn't running nothing in her own house but her gotdamn mouth, and run it she did, telling Barbara all her raggedy ass business with this trifling man.

She straight up told Barbara that she pays for everything for this fucking hobosexual—his clothes, his car, his food, the bed he sleeps in—everything!

Like girl. Are you his woman or his sugar mama?

She legit told Barbara that she pays for the car the man drives, and I'm sure Barbara wanted to interject and say "Girl, we fucked in that car at the beach last week," but she couldn't get a word in edgewise cause Shirley dumb ass kept going.

Shirley told Barbara that the reason she shared all of that with her is so that Barbara will know how much she loves this community dick they both enjoying and how much she will do to keep that community dick in her house.

She then had the nerve to tell Barbara "If you were in my shoes, you would feel the same way too," and the lie detector determined that was a gotdamn lie.

Remember, Shirley called Barbara, not the other way around.

Girl, Barbara don't give a fuck. She fucking your man, riding around with him in a car you pay for and enjoying her life. You the one over there stressing the fuck out, Shirley. Get a gotdamn clue!

Then she asks Barbara if she can see where she's coming from, which, no you gotdamn goofy, she cannot.

She asks if Barbara would do the same thing, and I'm sure at this point Barbara was leaned over with the phone cradled in the crook of her shoulder as she polished her toes.

In other words, Barbara was completely unbothered.

Then Shirley asked whoever else might be listening whether she should just step aside and let Barbara take what was rightfully hers, and it's like sis. He gone already. That nigga is FOR THE STREETS. He for everybody and your goofy ass is financing it.

But y'all. It gets worse. At this point, Shirley makes the bol statement "I ain't gonna let you break up my happy home."

Uh. Ma'am. Clearly it ain't that happy. Move around.

To make it even more laughable, she tells Barbara "Now you see I don't want no trouble now. I hope you understand.
I love that man and he's mine."

Shirley. You started it! You clearly wanted trouble calling this woman's house with your bullshit!

She then tells Barbara "You should be woman enough to understand."

Sis. You should be woman enough to confront your man. Like what part of this makes sense to you? You found her name and number in his pockets. Why didn't you start there?

In conclusion, Shirley was an insecure bitch who should have known better, and Barbara was a goon who eventually clapped back.

Thank you for reading my Real Nigga Dissertation on Woman to Woman. I hope you enjoyed it.

This is Barbara's clapback by the way.

Study it, because I will do a dissertation on that next.

OK, so boom. Like I said, Barbara was a goon. This part of the lecture will be quick. Barbara was straight and to the point.

She straight up told Shirley, "Look here, you dummy. I can't do all that extra shit you doing for this negro. I'm young, in school and don't have nothing to offer him but good pussy. AND HE LOVES IT."

She told Shirley that's all he wants from her—good pussy.

The disrespect! She said Shirley called playing on her phone, so she was going to play right in Shirley's face.

She told Shirley she didn't give a good gotdamn who claimed that raggedy ass nigga. All she wanted was the dick. Basically "Bitch, we fucking What you gon' do?"

She then dug the dagger in deeper by telling Shirley "Bitch, while you was busy digging through pockets and shit, this man was over here all night licking my booty!!! So what's the real problem sis?"

She then dropped the mic by saying "I mean, girl, you doing too much for his ass anyway. You on my phone begging cause a man you claim to love so much be over here loving me. Girl, bye."

Barbara won. The end.

Pop quiz:

Who was the real winner in all of this?