This month, a senate seat was lost because the male nominee sent stupid texts to his mistress and a prominent male writer lost his job for taking out his dick in a meeting but the important thing to remember is that you can’t trust women because they get periods sometimes.
Which reminds me is there any other time a person is bleeding profusely where it’s considered embarrassing and shameful and not, you know, bleeding?
*walks up to car crash victim*
My GOD, cover UP a little
My GOD, cover UP a little
*hands tampon to person who walked through a glass door*
“Just shove this up in there, YES there’s a small chance it’ll kill you, stop complaining, you’re gross.”
“Just shove this up in there, YES there’s a small chance it’ll kill you, stop complaining, you’re gross.”
*examines stab wound*
“I think the important thing to consider is whether it’s gross to have sex with you right now.”
“I think the important thing to consider is whether it’s gross to have sex with you right now.”
Anyway these are things I think about in the shower because I’m not good enough to do standup.
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