The blind pilgrim suspected her new companions were odd—the dogs howling everywhere was a dead giveaway—but they were polite, helpful without being condescending, and best of all, absolutely no one bothered her on the road. Image
When she finally arrived at the holy well, the tall one found her a good seat and the damp one described the place in elaborate detail, with particular attention to the plants growing around the water’s edge.
“Are you leaving?” she asked.
“We ate our fill days ago,” said the damp one kindly, “but it seemed rude to abandon you before you reached your destination.”
(Look, I slapped down some textures in Procreate and then looked for what the shapes looked like and started trying to make them look more like that and then it was a couple hours later and I had whatever the hell this is.)

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More from @UrsulaV

28 Nov
All the recent Catholic Discourse makes me a little sad that my short story didn’t win the Hugo at Dublin Worldcon, because that was the only time I was ever gonna have the chance to give the speech about my grandmother’s Catholic polyamory to a primarily Catholic audience.
For those who have not heard the tale, Grandma was a woman of strong appetites and equally strong folk Catholicism, which meant that she strongly objected to sex outside of marriage. Her solution was just to marry each of them and then, when they tapped out, get divorced.
But this was long ago—Grandma was a Rosie the Riveter in WW2—and divorces were tricky and annulments, which of course she also had to get, required the Church’s approval.

So Grandma had a system.
Read 14 tweets
25 Nov
The Japanese fatsia is blooming! This is a big tropical-looking shrub that’s much hardier than it looks. Generally quite well-behaved and a good screening shrub. It’s also attracting some pollinators, like my neighbor’s honeybees! Image
The honeybees I expected, but there’s also a bunch of flies on it that I don’t recognize. Image
The flowers are impressively alien-looking, but honestly, it’s a shrub you grow for the foliage. Makes a nice screen, no maintenance, very well-behaved and doesn’t rampage everywhere. I’m a sucker for big leaves. Image
Read 4 tweets
17 Nov
It’s D&D night, and the party has encountered a corgi vampire!
CORGI PALADIN: I knew something was wrong when he wouldn’t let me sniff his butt.
The vampire has a coffin full of tennis balls.
GM: It’s really more of a ball pit shaped like a coffin.
CORGI: I JUMP IN
PARTY: We question whether this was included in the original design of the dungeon.
CORGI: I turn undead! I hold up my holy symbol and say “You are a Bad Dog!”
GM: He saves.
CORGI: He’s still a bad dog.
Read 17 tweets
2 Nov
So there I am the liquor store, contemplating my incipient recreational alcoholism, when I hear one of the clerks say to the other, “That duck is so mean.”
The speaker is a young woman. Her coworker, a wild haired older gent, says, “What’s he do all day?”

DUCK-OWNER: Hangs around with his girlfriend! And honks whenever anybody drives up! I don’t need him to honk, I have dogs for that!

I briefly contemplated honking dogs.
WILDHAIRED OLDER GENTLEMEN: Well, he’s a duck.
DU: And he attacked someone the other day!
WHOG: *nods knowingly, as if duck attacks are on the rise*
DU: I think he’s mad at me because I put him in a harness.
Read 7 tweets
31 Oct
If you’re ever feeling guilty about not cooking a fresh home-cooked meal, a reminder that people in cities historically either had cooks or ate at food stalls, going back to Ancient Greece. Ancient Egypt, too, although since everybody ate bread, beer, and onions, less of a thing.
It’s a weird quirk of our obsession with nuclear families that everybody is expected to have time, skill, and equipment to cook daily and that if you’re a woman, particularly, you are a lesser person if you aren’t casually able to cook every day with random fresh ingredients.
Don’t buy into that. People since forever have hired cooks, gone to inns, lived in extended families where it wasn’t always your turn to cook, or ate such simplified diets that it was less of an issue.
Read 4 tweets
31 Oct
It’s New Glove Day! I wanted to take a glamour shot for the eleven seconds they were pristine.
It’s supposed to get cold tomorrow night. It maaaaay not be cold enough to kill some of my weird new salvias, but then again, it may. So I’m taking cuttings of the ones that have thrived, just in case, and will grow them out under lights in the garage.
A couple will come into the garage in containers once it gets Really Truly Cold, but I gotta get the cuttings before the leaves drop, which the cold snap might cause even if the roots are fine.
Read 20 tweets

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