30 years ago, a man walked into École Polytechnique and killed 14 women. As an engineering student many years later, we were taught about the tragedy, but as I’ve grown older, I’ve come to realize that my initial understanding was inadequate. 🧵
One man may have committed the act, but make no mistake: misogyny killed these women. Patriarchy killed these women. The belief that a woman could have the audacity to move beyond the confines of traditional gender roles killed these women.
This was not just one angry man. This was an inevitable byproduct of a system. Even now, there is an entire online radicalization pipeline ready to tell confused or angry boys and men that it’s the women’s fault. They’re the ones you should hate.
As men, we need to take ownership of what we’ve created. Not hurting women is not enough. How are we modelling healthy emotional expression? What are we showing the boys in our life? How are we ACTIVELY working to counteract the misogyny they’re exposed to?
I want to remember these women for what they were and what they might have been, but even more, I want to live in a world where we don’t raise boys to become men that hate women.
I forgot to add, @JulieSLalonde wrote a great piece last week about, among other things, the importance of naming the problem. Highly recommended reading. chatelaine.com/opinion/say-mi…
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These comments don’t appear out of thin air. They’re the product of attitudes and beliefs that are fostered over a lifetime. Attitudes towards women. Attitudes towards people that are different than you.
This isn’t about hockey. This is about how we raise men and boys. This is about the values that we as a society choose to instil. Men are not born valuing women by their dress size, nor that the best way to bond with your buddies is to mock others.
Thread: Because I'm a deeply stupid person, I'm going to briefly wade into American politics.
I can understand how exciting it must be for progressive Americans to have a candidate like Bernie to rally behind. Finally, someone espousing honest-to-goodness progressive values.
Medicare-for-all! 100% renewable energy! Free college! I can only imagine how energizing it is to have these ideas platformed on the national stage. And he's polling so well! No wonder the Bernie bros and gals can't wait to get out of bed and spread his message far and wide.
Unfortunately, there is a cold, hard truth to America. We saw it in November 2016. We saw it when George W. Bush's approval rating hit 90 (NINETY!) percent the weeks after 9/11. And we saw it yesterday with Biden's success.
A number of years ago, my ex-partner and I moved into a new home. Our neighbours were a lovely couple in their early-30s. We weren’t close, but we had many of those random, friendly conversations that you have with your neighbours.
During the winter, we had an unspoken agreement about snow shoveling: whomever got out first would shovel the walks in front of both houses. We never openly discussed it, but it was just one of those little perks when you get along with your neighbours.
We never kept track of who shoveled when, but it always felt equitable.
The years went on, and they had two children fairly close together. I noticed that I saw the woman less often, but thought nothing of it.