Thread by @GuardianofJupi1

He woke up, heart-racing and his body drenched. His breaths were short and panicky. The first thing he saw was the dark room and the last thing he remembered was Jin Guangyao coming at him in the Guanyin Temple. He was so sure the attack would hit him and he braced for his heart-

to be pierced.

He was so sure he was dead man; killed right in front of Jin Ling and for one split second, he mourned for his nephew.

But now... was it all a dream? But how could a dream be so vivid like it was memories of a past, rather than simply imagination?

Hastily, he threw the blanket that was covering him, scrambling to search for a match to light up the light. But everything felt wrong. Nothing was like his own room. There was no table beside the bed, the bed height was higher and even the scent of the room was different.

Panic welled within him. His feet moved without plan as he rushed towards what he thought to be a door. In the dark, he stumbled and after two tries, he finally touched a door.

He pushed it open, ran outside before his feet halted in shock.

He was in Cloud Recesses!

---

He didn't recall much after that, but before he knew it, he went back to the room, grabbing the nearest blue and white robe hung in the armoire, heaving huge relief when he saw Sandu and immediately flew away.

In the deep uncertainty, he began to fly blindly towards Lotus Pier.

What was he doing in the Cloud Recesses in the first place?! And in such indecent night robes! Did Zewu-Jun bring him here after the event in Guanyin Temple? Did Jin Guangyao did stab him?

Thoughts after thoughts tormented his mind. When he arrived at Lotus Pier, the sight that-

greeted him gave him a pause that instead of flying directly towards the courtyard, he instinctively dropped down in front of the main gate.

He took a moment to take everything in. The atmosphere was harsh and sombre. The lotuses swayed in silent eerieness and there were two-

guards that he didn't recognise stationed at the gate. He knew that this was not *his* Lotus Pier.

He took tentative steps towards them.

"Jiang-xiansheng!" One of them called out. "What are you doing here? Did you sneak out from Meishan Yu again without Madam Yu's knowledge?"

Meishan Yu?! Why on earth would he be there? Why on earth would he even be in Cloud Recesses? But the rush of confusion halted when he realised something.

Wait- "Ma- Madam Yu?" he asked in disbelief gasp.

"So, you really did sneak out?" The guards laughed but not maliciously,-

just fond, like he had been doing this for the longest time. Like it was an inside joke shared between him and the guards. "You better go back to Meishan Yu before Madam Yu come, wreaking havoc here. Plus, your best friend isn't here. He went out accompanying Sect Leader Jiang."

He was numb with the revelation that his mother was alive and lived in Meishan Yu. Did it mean, a-niang never married Jiang Fengmian at all, for her to still live in Meishan Yu? But... the guard did call him *Jiang*-xiansheng. What was going on.

So, he stepped on Sandu once-

again and this time, he flew to the direction of Meishan Yu. A few hours later, the main house of Meishan Yu Sect came to view and he dropped down. His hands and feet were cold and his heart was beating harsh. His face pale for each step he took.

And then... "A-Cheng?!"

He gasped as he turned around and he saw his mother *walking* towards him, surprise look was on her face.

Madam Yu was not wearing the usual purple robe. She was wearing Meishan Yu colours that favour light shades. She wore her hair, not as elaborate as he had always seen her-

mother wore, simple but tasteful bun and braids. But the most prominent different was her mother's face. Gone were the lines of anger and discontent, Madam Yu in front of him looked younger, without scowls between her eyebrows and her lips were framed with slight laughter lines.

Tears blurred in his eyes at the sight of his mother. The last time he saw her, she was hanging for days in Lotus Pier courtyard. She was dead because her useless son couldn't save her.

But she was alive now and he couldn't believe it. "A-niang..." he gasped, tears falling down

his cheeks as he took one shaky step after another. Before he knew it, he was running towards her. "A-niang!"

He fell into his mother's readily opened arms, which was strange but he was done caring about all the weirdness around him since he woke up this morning, wrapping his-

arms around her mother tight and desperate and needy. He didn't care if everybody saw him like that.

Everything that he did - killing the Wens, participating the Sunshot Campaign, rebuilding the Lotus Pier, breaking his back and heart and sanity - was because of her.

Her mother who had her own heart broken by a husband who didn't love her and also, the son that looked too much like her.

"Aiya, A-Cheng..." She scolded him, but still her arms around him tight. "What's got you like this?"

There were no words to utter, just a huge pent-up,-

grief heaving within him, like the dam broke and all the past sorrow and regret came out flowing, bursting. He just shook his head hard and embraced Madam Yu harder.

If this was the dream, he never wanted to wake up.

"A-Cheng, look at me," Madam Yu pried his face away gently.

"Won't you tell me what's wrong? What are you doing here? Did Xichen make you sad?"

He jerked his head away, eyes wide and mouth agape. "What?"

"What do you mean what?" Madam Yu huffed. "Lan Xichen, your husband of two weeks. What? Do you have your first fight already?"

What?!

---

If he thought seeing his mother *alive* would immune him from any more shock, the news that he was apparently married to Lan Xichen - the esteemed Zewu-Jun?? - was even greater curveball this dream threw at him.

The same Zewu-Jun who barely gave him a glance? Who allowed-

Jin Guangyao to openly snub Yunmeng Jiang Sect by excluding them in the Venerated Triad? The same Zewu-Jun who smiled at him in any conferences only to move his attention quickly to his sworn brothers?

The same Zewu-Jun who looked as if his heart was breaking into pieces as the-

revelation of his sworn brother unraveled. He was pretty sure Zewu-Jun's heart was firmly in Jin Guangyao's hands.

And now, he was being told he was *married* to him?

Did that also mean, the room that he had awakened up this morning to was Hanshi? Oh hell, he wished he could-

remember something from this world? Because how the *hell* did he get saddled up with Lan Xichen in the first place?

"A-Cheng, you don't too good," Yu Ziyuan's voice sounded worried as she held on to her son's arms tightly. "You look like you're about to keel over."

Well, that was because he did feel light-headed. How in the world did the revelation his mother was still alive made his heart burst in rejoice but the news he was married to Zewu-Jun caused him to faint?

"Come, let's go in. You can tell a-niang all about it," Yu Ziyuan pulled-

his arms towards the main house firmly. His breath hitched because he remembered in his youth when all his mother ever touched him was when she tugged to shove him in front of his father.

This version of his mother now tugged him so that she could comfort him from the woes that-

hadn't even told her yet. There was no judgement in her face and no fear of him showing weakness. Just a motherly concern for her inconsolable child.

The force of the tug was the same but his heart ached in a total different way.

Tears once again burned in his eyes.

"A-niang..." he began haltingly once they were seated in her room. "I- This may sound strange but I can't recall a major portion of my past. When I woke up in Zewu-Jun's room this morning, I admit I was panicked enough that I left everything behind and simply flew to Lotus Pier."

Yu Ziyuan's eyes widened. If she ever doubted her son's words, the fact that he called his husband 'Zewu-Jun' was enough to convince her. "Was it an accident? A curse?" She asked before berating herself an idiot. "Never mind that. How could you know when you can't remember."

"You- you believe me?" he asked. Was it ever this easy with his mother before?

"Of course!" Yu Ziyuan retorted indignantly. "Why wouldn't I? Was there ever a time I didn't believe you?!"

Now this was familiar. The fierce retort and snappish gesture- but the words were foreign.

He shook his head in uncertain. "I- I don't know. I can't remember."

Yu Ziyuan studied her son carefully. Something didn't add up. She believed when he said he didn't remember his life, but then, he still remembered Lotus Pier enough that his first instinct was to go there.

He still remembered Lan Xichen but only as Zewu-Jun. Did that mean, he remembered only the earlier portion of his life? If that was so, why was he looking at her like everything she did surprise him? Like he was discovering her anew?

"A-Cheng... This is not you not remembering,-

right? Do you remember me *differently*?" She asked shrewdly.

He snapped his head back to watch his mother in awe. "How- how do you-"

Yu Ziyuan snorted. "I am not an idiot. I can make inference from the way you keep looking at me like I am something novel, rather than unknown."

"Just how do you remember me, A-Cheng?" she asked.

He stared at this version of his mother and compared it to the long-held memories of his lost one. "You were harsh and determined. Your words were cutting but your actions were desperate."

"Desperate for what?" she frowned.

"You lost a-die's affection and you're desperate to make sure I didn't lose his as well. So you pushed me to strive for the top position in every class, just so he could see me. But he never did. In the end, I was still just an afterthought to him- a son who could never measure."

Yu Ziyuan let out a harsh laughter. "In the end? Does that mean, in your memory, I was a fool who stayed with Jiang Fengmian until I die?"

"You meant, you aren't now?"

"When Jiang Fengmian brought in the strayed child of his long-lost love, I endured. When he grew distant from-

me as he rather loving a ghost than me, I persisted. When he elevated Wei Wuxian into the inner circle of the main family, I ignored." Yu Ziyuan huffed. "But when he blatantly shamed me and *my children* by snubbing you in front of the disciples in favour of Wei Wuxian,-

my patience to him ran out. How dare he praised Wei Wuxian while demeaning you?! Even after knowing how hard you worked for your skill and knowledge? And how dare he said Wei Wuxian understood the motto better than you, when he knew you did that everyday!"

"I endured living in the shadow of his dead lover's memory even when I knew I couldn't compete. But when I saw he did the same thing to you, that was when I draw the line. I stayed because I wanted you to inherit the sect. I want a better life for you. But at what cost?"

"At the cost of my sanity and peace? At the cost of your upbringing and happiness? No, I couldn't," Yu Ziyuan sighed harshly.

After a few moments of silence, she reached out to caress his cheeks gently. "A-Cheng... May this jolt your memory."

*We* left *him* behind."

"We left behind a life of me, as the major sect leader wife, and you, as the heir. All that worth nothing if all it did cause us unhappiness." She said softly. "All I wanted for you was a life worth living. So, I came back to Meishan Yu with you and Yanli."

"And it was ten years ago." Yu Ziyuan concluded.

He stayed silent as he tried to come together with this new reality. "I- I think I know where you're different than with a-niang from my memory."

"Tell me."

"I think you knew when to give up, something she never learned to do."

Yu Ziyuan smiled and he was again struck by how much softer she looked. Was this how a-niang would look like if a-die would just try to love her? How different it was by just being away from Jiang Fengmian.

She was so beautiful and a-die was an idiot to ever let her go.

"I supposed I should be thankful. We may not hold high position in the cultivation world anymore but we got each other and that was all I ever wished for," Yu Ziyuan pulled him into her arms and he allowed himself the luxury to just sink into the warmth of his mother's embrace.

"Besides," she continued, there was a rare tone of mischievous in her voice. "Who care about Yunmeng Jiang Sect, when you managed to capture Sect Leader Lan's hand in marriage. Being his cultivation partner was better, in my opinion. And he was so enamoured by you."

Immediately he blushed red and hot. Yu Ziyuan laughed.

"About that-" he stammered because seriously, how did that happen?!

But he was stopped from asking for more when he heard a shout from outside.

"Please!" the voice sounded distraught. "Is he here? I need to know!"

"Oh ho?" Yu Ziyuan remarked teasingly. "Speak of the angel and he is here. And he sounds panic."

The blush intensified. In his wildest dream and vision and any parallel universe, he could never imagine his mother - the harsh Violet Spider - would tease him about his *husband*.

"A-niang-" he stuttered.

"Now that Lan Xichen is here, I supposed we should ask him why did you lose you memory of this life and are remembering another life's memory." She was back being haughty and determined.

But he couldn't see any trace of bitterness in the harshness.

He stood to follow. "But... on the second thought," She smiled wickedly. He stopped as she held him back. "Lan Xichen did lose you after he promised to keep you safe."

"A-Cheng, you stay in here. I want to talk to him alone."

He blinked and immediately felt sorry for Zewu-Jun.

--

Yu Ziyuan walked out- her head held high, back straight and her lips curved up slightly. In front of her, Lan Xichen was pacing in the courtyard agitated with barely contained panic.

"Xichen!" She called out The pacing stopped with a pair of dark amber eyes looked at him.

"Yuemu!" Lan Xichen hastened towards his mother-in-law.

She could barely hide her fond laughter. Zewu-Jun, the ever graceful and elegant cultivator, reduced to a nervous wreck because of her son. Her heart swelled in pride and love for both of them.

"What's with the hassle?"

Lan Xichen was ready to sacrifice himself to the wrath of the over-protective, fierce Yu Ziyuan because how could he lose his husband? Of course Wanyin would wake up confuse and in panic after being blasted by such powerful artifact. What was he thinking leaving him all alone?

"I am at my wit's end!" Lan Xichen said. "I left him just for a while to get a breakfast, but when I returned, he was gone, together with Sandu, so I figure that he might have flown to either Lotus Pier to see Wei Wuxian or to Meishan Yu. But Wei Wuxian didn't see him!"

Yu Ziyuan rolled her eyes at the mention of the Yunmeng Jiang Sect heir's name. She still didn't understand why A-Cheng and Wei Wuxian were such a close friend despite the bad blood between Jiang Fengmian and her. Both of them avoided each other, but the fate mocked their-

enmity by making the bond between Wei Wuxian and Jiang Wanyin so unbreakable that river of animosity and distance couldn't weaken their bond.

"Wei Wuxian has promised to look for Wanyin in the places they often go." Lan Xichen said hastily.

"Slow down, Xichen. Why don't you-

start from the start and tell me what had happened."

Lan Xichen took a deep breath. "Yesterday, the juniors had stumbled upon an array of very old artifact within the long abandoned temple up in a hill. The nearby villagers wanted to expand their plantation field and the plan-

encroached the foot of the hill. They hired us to undo any untriggered array. None of us is as well-verse as Wanyin in undoing demonic arts, especially breaking curses, so naturally I asked Wanyin to look at it.

By the symbol used in array, its purpose is to steal souls to gain-

its own life. But when Wanyin was trying to neutralise the curse placed on the artifact, the curse was somehow activated and Wanyin did something to counteract the curse. The next thing we all knew, Wanyin was engulfed in dark smoke. And he was left unconscious."

Yu Ziyuan sighed. She knew A-Cheng was excellent in defeating demonic cultivation (which also succeeded in refraining that reckless Wei Wuxian from trying any), but hadn't she taught him about being careful too?

Maybe the counteract action that he did cause his own soul to be-

exchanged to another life? Or did A-Cheng simply received the memory of another Jiang Wanyin and the memory overwhelmed his current self, making him forget about himself? Only time would tell.

She raised her hands and put them on her hips. Her eyebrows crooked and Lan Xichen-

flinched instinctively at that familiar pose. He was reminded of the months he spent chasing after Jiang Wanyin, courting him under the suspicious eyes of Violet Spider.

Yu Ziyuan was a woman to be reckoned with. Her high cultivation and her status were intimidating enough, but-

the most *concerning* thing was the powerful Zidian. Lan Xichen had lovely memory of Yu Ziyuan threatening him, Zidian crackling loudly, to take care of her son's happiness that day when he asked for her permission to marry Jiang Wanyin.

He had withstood countless ghouls,-

demons and beasts. He had faced equally beastly sect leaders of the cultivation world, especially the Wen Sect and now from Yunmeng Jiang Sect as well since he started courting Jiang Wanyin. But nothing intimidated him as much as Yu Ziyuan being all protective over her children.

"Did I hear it correct? Did you just admit you *lost* your cultivation partner?" She asked silkily, her eyes arched warningly. However, inside she was laughing when Lan Xichen's face paled even though he was a whole head taller than her. But still she applauded when Lan Xichen-

remained unmoved, back straight and looking straight at her. He was ready for any action delivered by her, just so he could find his husband.

Now this was the husband she wanted A-Cheng to be with. A husband with love strong enough to withstand any hatred, fear and rejection-

from people around them. The enormity of the feeling Lan Xichen held for A-Cheng and vice-versa was something that would always humble Yu Ziyuan.

"Well?"

"Yuemu, I-" Lan Xichen stammered, heart plummeted when he realised his husband hadn't come here. Where could he be?

"You're right. I should have taken care of him better. I know I promise you that. But I will find him no matter how long it takes. I just- I thought he came here. Apparently not, if you didn't anything about this, so, I'm apologised for my carelessness and-"

Yu Ziyuan took pity on her son-in-law. He seemed remorseful enough. "Xichen," she interrupted.

Lan Xichen looked at her.

"A-Cheng is inside."

The expression on Lan Xichen changed into deep relief. He could feel his knees weakened and a huge smile broke out.

He tried to walk passed her to see Wanyin, but Yu Ziyuan stopped him. "He is awfully confused, though."

"What do you mean?" Dread filled him.

"There's another set of memory in him. Another Jiang Wanyin from another world. When he counteracted the curse, he either had summoned-

the other's soul and his memory overwhelmed A-Cheng's, making him remembering other people's live, or, their souls were exchanged."

Lan Xichen's mouth fell open in shock. "You- you mean..."

Yu Ziyuan sighed. "A-Cheng may not be himself."

"Permanently?" Lan Xichen couldn't breathe.

"I don't know. But it's unlikely to be permanent. No ancient artifact that I know of had that much of spiritual power to sustain permanent exchange. I'm more inclined to believe in time the effect will fade out."

---

Jiang Wanyin peered into the polished bronze mirror. He watched his own face curiously.

The man staring back at him was the same as well but still he could see there was something different in the way his face looked and the way he carried himself.

His almond-shape, slanted eyes were less fierce and his mouth was less severe. There were even faint laugh lines framing his lips. His face looked softer.

This was the face freed from years of disappointment, begging for his father's leftover love. He realised this version of-

him didn't know the feelings of being competed with his siblings, being put down even when he thought he had achieved something worth of his father's pride and being cast aside to the point his mother had to push him in front of his father just to be seen.

This version of him didn't know the grief of having his family massacred so brutally, the trauma of being tortured by the same people who decimated his family and the anguish of not having the space and time to mourn.

This version of him didn't have a-month old infant trusted-

his care while rebuilding the same buildings that caged the ghosts of his massacred family. He didn't know how it felt to be outcast and hated due to a reputation.

This version of him didn't know the meaning of loneliness.

And regret.

And untended sorrow.

How lucky he was.

Lost in his thought, a drop of delicate tear slid down to his cheek.

"Wanyin..." A soft voice greeted him from behind.

He quickly wiped the tear before turning around. There, Lan Xichen stood- tall, strong and ethereal. Just as he knew him to be. Only now, he was his husband.

His heart raced once again due to the reminder of the impossibility of it all.

Lan Xichen's heart plunged when he walked into the room only to see his husband's tear. Yu Ziyuan had told him all that she knew about the memory that seemed to take over Wanyin.

The possible childhood emotional trauma from dyfunctional family and losing his family. She suspected that the wounds ran deeper than just his family, but she didn't know what.

"A-Cheng seems so haunted for something. And he looked so hurting and angry and just *sad*. I don't-

know why. But will you ask of him, Xichen? His head may not remember you as his husband, but a heart will always know its soulmate."

With the strength of his love for Wanyin, he walked closer to this man, whose soul may not be his own. But the heart within him was Lan Xichen's.

Wanyin gave it to him months ago.

"Zewu-Jun..." Jiang Wanyin whispered and Lan Xichen's heart broke because the last time he called him that was when they first met years ago.

They started as friends before Lan Xichen insisted in changing their relationship into lovers.

"Please..." Lan Xichen said softly. "I know you don't remember me, but please don't call me that."

Jiang Wanyin swallowed hard. "Then, how would you like me call you?"

Husband, Xichen-ge, Lan Huan - his heart screamed but what came out was, "Call me Lan Xichen, please."

Zewu-Jun's face seemed painful when he said that, but Jiang Wanyin nodded his head. "Lan- Lan Xichen..." It sounded foreign on his tongue but something in his heart hummed, please.

"Will you come home? Or are you more comfortable here? Madam Yu thinks that this is temporary."

Jiang Wanyin hesitated. In his memory, Cloud Recesses was more familiar to him than Meishan Yu Sect. But a-niang was here. And he was reluctant to let her go.

Apparently, Zewu-Jun could read his mind. "If I invited Madam Yu to come with us, will that made you feel at ease?"

The amethyst eyes widened. "You'd do that?"

"Yes, of course," Lan Xichen said hastily. The surprise look from him simply being indulged was heartbreaking.

"Then, yes, I will come ho-home with you." He stumbled on the word home.

The relief was stark on Lan Xichen's face.

--

For the days to come, Jiang Wanyin spent his time with his mother. He still couldn't get over the miracle of seeing her alive. He also got visited by Jiang Yanli, whom was still married to Jin Zixuan and... a two-year old Jin Ling in her arms. Jiang Wanyin had breathed in deep-

when he realised in this world, not only he was un-orphaned, but Jin Ling as well. In this life, Jin Ling still had a-jie's hands to hold onto and his father's back to climb over. The toddler's cheeks were red from the constant laughs from his father's teasing and not from being-

bullied and teased for being an orphan.

He had gathered Jin Ling into his arms and held him for the longest time until Jin Ling squirmed and wiggled his way out of it. The brat had slobbered his face until he let him go.

But the most surprise visit of all was from Wei Wuxian.

His breaths hitched when he saw Wei Wuxian rushed into Cloud Recesses, wearing the official purple robe of Yunmeng Jiang Sect - the heir - , and flung himself into Jiang Wanyin's arms. And the words came falling like cracked dam. "A-Cheng! Did you know how worried I am when-

Zewu-Jun told me you're missing?! I looked everywhere for you, all the places that we always go - the market, the river we swam, the opera houses but you weren't there! And now you lost your memory?! Are you telling me you don't remember me?!"

Jiang Wanyin was stood frozen.

So, his father let his wife divorce him without any fight and then, he added insult to the injury by making Wei Wuxian the heir? The sheer audacity of him! No wonder a-niang didn't want anything to do with anymore!

At least there was one thing that remained consistent.

"Are you and I... close?" Jiang Wanyin haltingly asked. In his memory, the love and hate for his former shixiong intermingled so closely that he didn't know to separate them anymore. Could it be here, Jiang Wanyin had never hated Wei Wuxian despite everything that happened?

Could it be this simple?

Wei Wuxian looked so aghast at the question. "A-Cheng! Of course we are! If it didn't break back then, nothing could ever break us in future! We made an oath, remember, to be sworn brother forever," Wei Wuxian raised his hand, a straight, clean knife-

scar ran across the palm. "We cut our hands and all!"

Heart raced, face hot, Jiang Wanyin looked down to his own palm; it was trembling. There, the similar scar adorned the flat plane. Sworn brother... them?

The part in him where he kept the deepest hurt over Wei Wuxian's-

betrayal ached terribly. The Wei Wuxian in his memory had hurt him so much with one bad decision after another until he was left alone, with nothing left but a hollow with fire of vengeance and hatred. And when he came back, he left him again after the massive lie was exposed.

But this Wei Wuxian was earnest in his love to him. He was the childhood friend that grew up to his own sworn brother - a dream that wasn't fulfilled in the previous life.

The scar on his hand tingled.

"A-Cheng, there's nothing I wouldn't do for you, just as I know you'd give-

up that much for me as well." Wei Wuxian grabbed his face before planting a kiss on his forehead. "We're brothers for this life and beyond this. The first person I'm going to look for in the next life is always going to be you."

Tears burned in his eyes.

This was what he wanted from Wei Wuxian. All he wanted from Wei Wuxian for him to reciprocate his love. To know that whatever happened in their life, they would always have each other.

"Promise me again!" Jiang Wanyin demanded, voice thick with emotion.

Wei Wuxian didn't understand the tears and he desperately wanted to. But something told him to concur with his didi's wish despite his hungry curiosity.

"A-Cheng, I promise to stay by your side. We're brothers for life and beyond."

Jiang Wanyin exhaled. "Me too, Wei Wuxian."

--

One thing that Jiang Wanyin noticed as days went by was how snippets of memories that he had never had before gradually slithering into his mind. And it was the strangest thing ever; as if he was watching his life in someone else's eyes - a mere observer, not a participant.

Like when he spent his time with a-niang. Madam Yu insisted in telling him the stories of the past, because she was sure that this was temporary. At first, he simply listened without really knowing the context.

"Remember the day we left Lotus Pier?" Madam Yu reminisced.

"You were fifteen and how you and Wei Wuxian cried while Jiang Fengmian and I pulled both of you apart. That boy kept on spouting about blood oath and all, and at time, I thought he was jesting."

While he was listening, he inhaled quietly when he indeed could remember it.

He could see in his mind, Wei Wuxian with tears streaming down his cheeks. He could recall the way his own heart breaking and the way his own voice hoarse from calling after his sworn brother. He remember the blandness in Jiang Fengmian's face as he watched his own wife and-

children walk away. There was no expression whatsoever on his father's face because they had never meant that much to him.

There was also a time when Wei Wuxian excitedly regaled the tale of them sneaking out of their own sects to meet either in Lotus Pier's night market or in-

Meishan Yu's festivals. When Wei Wuxian told him about the pastries that they had sampled or the opera that they had watched, Jiang Wanyin's mind slowly provided the images At first they were just faint echoes, but the more Wei Wuxian talked, the clearer the images were.

He remembered the tastes of the pastries and the scents of the night markets as if he was there.

And then, there was Lan Xichen.

Jiang Wanyin didn't know much about Zewu-Jun in his previous life. Not enough for him to be able to discern the difference between this Lan Xichen-

with Zewu-Jun that he knew.

Did Zewu-Jun ever smile like Lan Xichen did at him? The smile given to him made him feel like he was something Lan Xichen had wanted all along but not expecting to have at all. Jiang Wanyin felt seen and wanted, which was a novelty feeling.

Did Zewu-Jun's touch feel this grounding and warm and secured? Because each time Lan Xichen touched his face, his hands and his neck, Jiang Wanyin felt safe and belonged.

Did Zewu-Jun's speak with terms of endearment dropped from his mouth like honey. So freely, so sweet and so-

shamelessly. Everytime he heard his own name being called by that deep, masculine tone - *Wanyin...* - his inside shivered so delicious as if he was anticipating something.

Lan Xichen didn't allow his condition of not remembering them and their history to be the excuse to-

distant himself. In fact, Jiang Wanyin found the taller sect leader to be at his every turn and at every glance. He accompanied him in every meal and to all visit he made to the nearby town.

Lan Xichen didn't push him to remember like a-niang and Wei Wuxian. He was just there.

"Lan Xichen?" Jiang Wanyin asked.

"Yes, Wanyin?"

"Why didn't you ever tell me anything about us?"

Lan Xichen paused before turning around to look at his husband. "Do you want me to?"

Jiang Wanyin shrugged. "A-niang insists in reliving my childhood and Wei Wuxian is-

pressed to make me remember every prank we committed. They believe that by telling me more about this life, the effect of curse can be lifted earlier. But you never did seem interested in telling me anything. I was just wondering, that's all."

Lan Xichen quirked a smile. *Liar*

Being dishonest in his words only to be shown so clearly in his reactions was something both versions of Jiang Wanyin shared.

"Wanyin... I made a promise to you on the day you accepted my marriage proposal."

Jiang Wanyin raised his curious eyes to meet Lan Xichen's.

"I promise to love you in unconditionally in everyway for every life we live in." Lan Xichen reached for Jiang Wanyin's hand and raised to kiss each of finger reverently. "Yuemu and Wei-xiong want the Jiang Wanyin they know - the one who remembers them. I want that too, -

because heavens know how much I miss you, but, Wanyin, I love this version of you as well. The one who bore his physical and emotional scars so bravely, unlike anybody I know. The one who kept his feelings so closely to himself, building walls to keep everyone away."

Lan Xichen swept his lips from the fingers to the middle of his palm, a sweet smile graced his handsome face. He murmured, "You are my Wanyin no matter what version you came to me. Either you came from Meishan Yu or from Yunmeng Jiang; whether you are Sect Leader Jiang or simply

a cultivator, *I love you, Jiang Wanyin*. Please believe me."

His eyes burned, his throat tight and his heart thumping fast at the display of pure, simple love Lan Xichen had for him. How was this man even real?

"I remember you," Jiang Wanyin blurted out suddenly.

He jolted in shock. "What-?"

"The memories started coming back to me a few days back in fragments," He halted briefly before his newfound trust in Lan Xichen bolstered him. "But I remember you, as you are right now."

Voice hoarse as Lan Xichen asked, "What do you remember?"

Jiang Wanyin closed his eyes as he closed his grasp tightly onto Lan Xichen's trembling ones. "I recall being teased terribly by you when I went to Cloud Recesses, you were so shameless back then. Well, still are now."

"I recall the night you were heavily injured in a nighthunt-

went terribly wrong. I thought I'd lose you. The qi transfer was not fast enough to close the wound. I remembered asking you to hold on desperately."

Lan Xichen's eyes began to burn with disbelief tears as he stared at Jiang Wanyin.

Jiang Wanyin continued, eyes still close.

"There is this memory of the night with me crouching under a tree in a heavy rain. I was heartbroken and furious when I first heard the new Jiang Fengmian make Wei Wuxian his heir just a year after we were gone. And you came to me like a miracle. You watched me fall apart-

and without words, you- you picked up the pieces and make me whole again."

Delicate tears slipped through the closed eyes as he dove deep into his mind. Lan Xichen exhaled shakily as he openly shed his own.

"And then, there was this memory of us trying to confess to each-

other at the same time, that both of us couldn't hear what we were both trying to say." Jiang Wanyin huffed out a laugh at the memory. "I remember you trying to shut me up with a kiss only to have me bumped my forehead against your mouth."

Lan Xichen's lips stretched into a wide

smile despite the streaming of the tears. He let out tremulous, breathy laugh.

Jiang Wanyin dropped his voice low; fond and breathless as he delved into the next memory. "I also remember you wrapping your ribbon around my hands, demanding that I'd be your cultivation partner."

"Nothing deterred you- not my horde of aunts and a-niang's infamous Zidian. Not even Gusu Lan Sect elders objection and threats of losing position changed your mind. How I pulled away, thinking I could save you, when all along, you never needed my saving."

Jiang Wanyin swallowed down the rock stuck at the back of his throat. Slowly, he opened his eyes to look at Lan Xichen's face - the awe, the love and the devotion showed starkly on his face. Jiang Wanyin wondered whether his own face mirrored Lan Xichen?

Because this next memory

was the one that stuck with him the longest and the hardest.

He gently raised his own hands, his fingers traced the tear tracks on the pale, smooth cheeks. His thumbs wiped the dampness and his palms cradled Lan Xichen's jaws in silent reverence.

"I remember the first night-

after we got married. You were on your knees in front of me on the bed,. Your hands slipped under my headcover and we kissed underneath it."

Lan Xichen whispered, heart-racing. "I called you my husband. I called you a-Cheng..."

Jiang Wanyin smiled. "And I called you Huan-ge."

Lan Xichen groaned in deep relief as he instantly gathered Jiang Wanyin into his arms, holding him tightly. He peppered kisses on all over his husband's face. The whole three weeks Jiang Wanyin didn't remember him was the hell he never wanted to be in ever again.

"A-Cheng, my heart, my love," He murmured low and desperate and impatient. "Don't ever forget me. Don't ever forget us."

Jiang Wanyin kissed Lan Xichen back in equal fervour. Together with the memory, his heart finally recognised his husband. Or did his heart recognise-

Lan Xichen first as it waited his mind to come together? As flurry of memories of this lifetime returned back to him, the memories of the other lifetime remained.

How weird it was to remember two different lifetimes? It shouldn't be possible but here he was. He was Jiang Wanyin-

of Meishan Yu Sect, but he was also Jiang Wanyin of Yunmeng Jiang Sect. Perhaps in time, he'd find a way to reconcile but as of now, Jiang Wanyin focused all his being to the man who had waited so patiently for him to come back.

He didn't want to make Lan Xichen wait any longer.

💜BONUS💙

"Has Sect Leader Jiang awakened?" Lan Xichen asked Jin Ling. It has been a week after the event at Guanyin Temple. The sight Jin Guangyao stabbed deep into Jiang Wanyin's chest had prompted Jin Ling and Wei Wuxian to go absolute feral.

And Lan Xichen had stood back.

He allowed both of them to wreck their own vengeance on his sworn brother, while he worked to keep Sect Leader Jiang alive. He hadn't wanted to believe it then, but when he saw with his own eyes the true colour of Jin Guangyao, his heart was too broken to try anymore.

The wound on Sect Leader Jiang's chest was deep but Lan Xichen was sure he managed to close the wound before it became fatal.

So, imagine his surprise when Jin Ling sent missive, informing him that Sect Leader Jiang still hadn't woken up. He instantly flew toward Lotus Pier.

"No, Zewu-Jun. I am at loss. The healers said there isn't anything wrong with him."

He pressed his fingers on Jiang Wanyin's meridian point on the wrist. After a while, he frowned. It might be nothing but he thought there was a slight foreign spiritual energy in him. Gently, he-

pushed in his own cold qi into Jiang Wanyin, chasing after the strange energy to neutralise it.

It took some time but Lan Xichen was finally be able to do it. Instantaneously, Jiang Wanyin stirred out of his slumber and Lan Xichen released a relief sigh. But still, he wondered-

about that strange, strange qi.

Jiang Wanyin was slow to wake up. Lan Xichen sat on the bed beside him, eyes peered in concern as the pair of amethyst eyes made their appearance. Beside him, stood Jin Ling hovering anxiously.

"Jiang Wanyin..." Lan Xichen called softly.

"How do you feel?"

Jiang Wanyin licked his dried lips. He looked up to the ceiling in confusion. Then, he glanced to his side and he saw Lan Xichen.

A soft, relieved smile graced his face.

Lan Xichen and Jin Ling's mouth dropped down open in shock at the foreign smile.

Lan Xichen's heart freeze even more when Jiang Wanyin reached out to hold his hand.

"I feel like shit." Jiang Wanyin croaked. "That artifact packed some serious spiritual energy. But I'm glad I've neutralised it, *Huan-ge*"

Huan-ge?!! Lan Xichen was stunned.

Jin Ling gasped.

-----

Haha! Cue flustered Lan Xichen when Jiang Wanyin casually and freely touching him because, hello? this is my husband, dammit!

🤣🤣

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