Thread by @GbengaWemimo

A case was brought to me. A woman working with a multinational whose husband’s business was not doing well. The man returned from the UK with money and bought four trucks to start logistics business but within two years a series of bad decisions killed his business. He refused to

get a job. The wife was working with A bank and later moved to the multinational. She was paying the rent and maintaining the cars. She had money and thought as long as she was footing the bills, they should be fine. The husband stopped sleeping with her somehow. She said she

couldn’t say how that happened.
He would consider the fact that she had been working all day and shouldn’t be warming his bed at night and therefore restrain himself from making sexual advances. She felt since she was putting al the money on the table she shouldn’t be begging

for sex (What else was he supposed to be doing with his time) and she didn’t make the advances. After some time, he started to cheat on her.
She told her uncle what had been going on and how much of an ingrate her husband was. Her uncle picked up the phone and called his parents

His parents called a family meeting and confronted him about his inability to provide (They had no idea because his wife rented a duplex and they both drove good cars) He admitted it and there was a lot of talk. He felt his wife brought shame upon him and decided to leave the

marriage but he didn’t leave immediately because they have a daughter
He just switched off and started shopping for her replacement.
With the little money he gets from some hustling, he would look for a lady that would respect him and call him “Daddy” (This emphasis is mine pls)

and he started sleeping with such ladies. The wife came to me saying she was done with the marriage. The husband came to me saying he was done with the marriage. I listened to the two of them and tried to explain to the lady that a man does not instinctively think he deserves his

wife’s body if he was not providing for her (Some poor mentality guys running on basic instinct does this but a higher thinker wouldn’t), he wants to claim his wife and impress her! He wants her to jump on him and come preparing to do wonders to his body in the name of saying

“Thank you”. He doesn’t want to be with her while she is thinking “Just do whatever and get off me”. Being broke is psychologically draining! Men programmed to get off on respect and gratitude will express their need to others who will complement their desires! The wife cried

bitterly! She said she didn’t know providing everything and “Lording it over him could make make him resent her”. When I spoke to him, he said “He was done! He just wanted to be free of her money and her life and start afresh with someone who wouldn’t mind that he was making so

little.
I told the two of them to give it a year! This is the 19th month
They are still together. She is still with the multinational and makes majority of the money! But she had stopped Lording it over him and listens to him too. She also appreciates his contributions(no matter

how small or insignificant compared to what her money can do)
She came to see that when he buys stuff and feels happy with himself, he would hit the hammer very well for three or four days but when the euphoria of his good deed begins to fade off, he would be unable to knock the

door. She got it. He was wired to perform as a right not as a duty! She began to look for small contracts for him to do so that he will have more money and do more stuff so that the hammer can keep knocking. She said she got it somehow and he got it too.
The first instinct would

be to part ways but a dear friend once told me “Your partner, the one you got married to and having some challenges with is actually the one you can make things work with the best)
I took that counsel to heart.
Ps: Some men will sit down and be milking the wife but some men just

can’t do that. It belittles them and affects their confidence. Regardless of if the woman is the type to talk about it and prove a point with it or the one who provides and still respects them. We are all wired differently! Know your partner and work with each other’s strengths

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