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udon stan account x sunily oasis

15 Jan, 11 tweets, 2 min read

Im imagining BH Dazai meeting Chuuya’s dad and i’m fucking losing it

Chuuya: dad I got engaged 🥺

Rimbaud: WHAT? I haven’t even MET him what do u mean. Bring him to dinner

Dazai: shows up

Rimbaud: .....why did u bring ur fiancé’s dad

Chuuya: well, actually—

R: ur lying

R, wailing: where did I go wrong. Was I not loving enough? Was I not strict enough?

D: the problem is that you were TOO strict. Now he doesn’t feel comfortable without a strict, guiding figure in his life.

D: a daddy figure, if you will

R: faints

Chuuya, to Dazai: why

R: how old are you

D: 35

R: you could be COWORKER???!!!

D: arent you a lawyer

R: yes

D: i really could not be your coworker.

D, to Chuuya: should I tell him that I’m a criminal or.....?

C: absolutely not.

D: yeah Two criminals in the family are probably enough

R: TWO CRIMINALS??? WHAT DO YOU MEAN

D: he didn’t know about kouyou and kyouka did he

C: well NOW he does

R: what’s next...... what could happen next.... let me guess. Yosano is kouyous secret lover or something ridiculous

D: WELL— 😬

C, whispering: retirement home

D: i have discovered that I actually know nothing about that at all whatsoever.

R: at least KOUYOU chose a MAN HER AGE CHUUYA WHAT HAPPENED

Chuuya: actually Dazai is childhood friends with odasaku, ane-san is just a liar

R: what have I done to deserve this as your father

R, calling kyouka: is there anything you want to tell me? Are you also dating a man way too old for you?

Kyouka: omg I would never that’s disgusting 🤢

R: thank god—

Kyouka; I’m actually a lesbian

R:

Dazai, whispering to Chuuya: 10000 yen says she’s into milfs

Chuuya: why would you make a bet like that

Dazai: i’m JUST SAYING it’s probably genetic

R: if I had a nickel for every time one of my children turned out to be an international criminal, I’d have 2 nickels.

R; which isn’t a lot but it’s kinda weird it happened twice

R: well at least tell me there will be children soon

D: i already have a kid

R: how old? 🥺🥺🥺 please tell me I didn’t miss the toddler years, they’re so cute at that age—

D: only by a lil bit🥺

R: really??🥺🥺🥺🥺

C: Shuuji is 19

R:

R: you tricked me

D: i would never🥺

C, before dinner: he’s not going to like you on principle

D: i can tell you he probably won’t like me for my personality either—

C: be nice.

D: I’m only nice to you, love 🥺🥺🥰

C:

C: 🥺🥺

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More from @H4NDKINK

udon stan account x sunily oasis

@H4NDKINK

12 Jan

BH skk wedding vows 🥺

Dazai ends his speech with “you were not my first love, but you are my last” DONT TOUCH MD

Also dazai is dramatic and sweeps Chuuya into a very low dip for their first kiss 🥰

Read 5 tweets

udon stan account x sunily oasis

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2 Jan

wait a min..... BH skk sparring sessions 👁👁

Dazai being all cocky because he’s bigger and more experienced but he quickly learns that Chuuya is no one to take lightly when he gets caught and flipped over Chuuya’s hip 🥰🥰

Cut to dazai on his back on the floor winded and staring dazedly up at Chuuya, while Chuuya stands over him with a smug grin like “you know? I thought you’d be a /challenge/, but I guess I was wrong” and then Dazai grins and it’s /on/

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udon stan account x sunily oasis

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2 Jan

No thots head empty just BH Dazai and Oda in a bar fight 🥰

Like someone bumping into Dazai and causing a problem and he just reaches up and slams their head into the bar counter? Hi 😳

Some kid getting mouthy with Oda and is like “what are you gonna do about it old man” while shoving him and Oda elbows him in the face and breaks his nose 🥰🥰

Oda: I’m not OLD I’m finely-aged

Dazai: doesn’t that mean the same thing

Oda; whose side are you on.

Read 4 tweets

udon stan account x sunily oasis

@H4NDKINK

28 Dec 20

BH Chuuya makes a tiktok and his first video is one of those “why me and Shuuji will never fight over guys; Shuuji’s type: me (pictures of Chuuya). My type: his dad (pictures of Dazai)”

Chuuya also makes Dazai do one of those dances

Dazai: I’m not doing the stupid dance.
Chuuya, offscreen: do it or I won’t kiss you at all for 12 hours
Dazai:
C: 16 hours
D: tou know they outlawed cruel and unusual punishment—
C: 24 hours
D: FINE FINE IM DOING IT

Chuuya also makes one of those glo up videos with Yoko as a floppy, fluffy puppy and the best drops and it turns into a video of her taking down oda in full bite training gear

Read 8 tweets

udon stan account x sunily oasis

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26 Dec 20

his game? He's not entirely opposed to it-- he watches game playthroughs on Youtube just like everyone else-- but it's /not/ his idea of a 'date'. It seems boring, and doesn't include him.

Shuuji pulls him against his shoulder, wrapping his arm around his shoulders and grabbing+

the controller in front of him.

"This is one of my favorite games," he says, smashing a few buttons on his controller to start the game.

Chuuya's right; it is boring. Mostly because he doesn't really understand what's going on in the game and Shuuji dies too often for him to+

really figure it out. He also curses a /lot/ and his yelling next to Chuuya's ear makes him grimace.

"Wanna play?" Shuuji asks,and then promptly places the controller in his hands without waiting for a response.

He gives him a brief tutorial, which doesn't explain much as all,+

Read 1295 tweets

udon stan account x sunily oasis

@H4NDKINK

26 Dec 20

doesn’t want to walk. An Uber will take up most of his monthly allowance, and he doesn’t want to ask Dazai because he already made him breakfast and spent all morning with him,surely he has more important things to do than to take him home—

“What happened?”

Not realizing Dazai+

had returned, Chuuya flinches a little, head snapping up.

He had changed sometime when he was upstairs, and now he’s wearing a pair of dark jeans and a dark grey t-shirt.

(Chuuya is not mourning the view of the button down and the gray sweatpants. He’s not, even though he +

couldn’t /help/ to notice that the bulge was /big/, and he honestly doesn’t know if that’s because /Dazai/ is big or the sweats or just really loose.)

It takes him a second to remember that Dazai had asked him a question. “It’s nothing,” he says, and then when Dazai arches a +

Read 1335 tweets

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