A theme I have seen w/ some of my high-level college & pro clients lately is the difficulty they are having letting go of #mistakes. Perhaps it's due to time off from the pandemic & increased pressure they are feeling? Regardless, here are some thoughts on overcoming it. [THREAD]
It's natural to dwell on a mistake. Doing this for too long, though, can lead to more mistakes. Suddenly, instead of 1 error, you now have made 3. This can lead to frustration, anger, and decreased confidence. It also takes our focus out of the present & into the past or future.
Naturally, a place where a sport psychologist will start, then, is to bring the focus back into the present. After all, we can't change the past or control the future. Some common ways to do this are by focusing on breathing or using focal points.
Naming things you see in front of you can help too. "I see a white line, blades of grass, a candy wrapper, ..." This will automatically bring your focus back into the present.
Many psychologists will intervene using cognitive-behavioral (CBT) techniques, such as thought stopping or reframing. I have had some success doing this with clients as well.
One way to break the cycle of ruminating about the mistake, is to grab a handful of dirt or grass and hold it in your hand. Give yourself permission to dwell on the error as long as you are holding the dirt. When you are ready to let it go, let go of the dirt. Try it -- it works!
At the end of the day, it's all about developing a #growthmindset. Here is an overview, if you need one. Start by reminding yourself that the error is FEEDBACK. Think about all the time & money we spend on feedback! We pay for coaching all the time! ilovetowatchyouplay.com/2016/03/28/how…
So, I like to create a page with 3 columns. The 1st is the mistake, the 2nd is what was learned, and the 3rd is the correction that will be made going forward. The correction could be technical, tactical, physical, or mental.
Here's a technical example. In soccer, I take a shot on goal, and it sails over the crossbar. That was the mistake. In the 2nd column, I'd list that I was probably leaning too far back. In the 3rd column, I'd list strategies to keep my weight going forward (eg, chest over ball).
Or maybe it's tactical. In football, I am a WR that keeps getting jammed & can't run my crossing route. That's the mistake. The learning is that they are playing cover 2. The adjustment is to find the hole up the sideline behind the corner or to sit in between the safeties.
It could be mental. I'm on the first tee in golf and everyone is watching. I hit a nasty slice OB. That's the mistake. I learned that I was trying to crush the ball to impress my friends. The adjustment could be to take a deep breath and visualize a nice shot.
If the mistake or correction is physical, it could mean improved conditioning or flexibility. By making yourself go through this exercise, it will eventually become automatic in your mind. You won't need the paper anymore. And when you can do this, the mistake won't sting as much
Good luck, and let me know how it goes! If you have other tips or tricks, I'd love to hear them as well.
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