I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of rotting daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Browning and dying in the breeze.
1/4
Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Shrivelled there dead in flyblown dance.
Flag wavers with them danced; but they
Out-did the sparkling Brexit glee:
A Leaver could not but be gay,
In such festering company:
I gazed—and gazed—but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:
For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye,
That leaver’s bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with dead daffodils.
• • •
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When I arrived in his office he pointed at a small pile of cocaine on his desk. I was horrified. A British guest should never impose like that.
"No thanks, I've brought my own." I said.
He grabbed my crotch.
"So, is that a B17 in your pocket, or are you just pleased to see me Jeff?"
"Mike." I corrected. "And its an erection." You could feel the electricity in the room.
Not wanting to be too forward but fully aware the special relationship needed maintaining,
I asked if I could massage his shoulders. He agreed.
"Do you think your incessant debasement of standards, associations with racists and paedophiles, and utter unsuitability for presidency, will have a negative effect on American politics?"
My parents are eating different things at different times. I am eating six meals a day because I don’t want to hurt their feelings.
Dec 4th
We had our measles jabs at school today. Dr Whitty came to give them out during
double maths. Mr Hancock insisted he administer the doses using the syringes his neighbour made out of Meccano and repurposed Christmas tree decorations. Des Swayne in 4C went mental and started screaming “You’re not putting that shit in me, wake up sheeple,
its all part of the plandemic, they’re injecting microchips from Amstrad computers and we’re all going to end up in a Treasure Island Dizzy computer game”. In the end the PE teachers Mr Mercer and Mr Tugendhat had to put him in a choke hold until Dr Van Tam had injected it.
Michael Gove went on local radio to talk about our school this morning. We listened over breakfast. He lied a lot and contradicted everything he had said when he went on last time, but he was swanning around the playground
at break like David Essex, bragging that he could sell ice to the Eskimos or off-shore tax arrangements to Tory donors. So at lunch Barry Kent graffitied ‘Michael Gove is the universe boss’ on Mr Johnson’s Nissan Prairie to see if he could talk his way out of that.
Dec 3rd
Michael Gove has been suspended. He is making me go to his house at lunchtime to report on any political manoeuvering in the playground. I missed my lunch, but Mrs Coffey the dinner lady was very kind and kept my meal hot for me. Four Scotch Eggs. She