Watching the new season of a show that is now depicting the start of the pandemic. It's the first of my regular shows that I've seen that acknowledges the pandemic and watching the characters first learn about COVID was awful, so triggering. I wanted to cry. Run away and cry.
The pandemic has killed at least 2.5 million people around the world so far. And we have not reckoned with the magnitude of our pain and grief. We are not prepared for the bottom of the bottomless pit of grief, as I say here feministgiant.com/p/deliberate-b…
It's been a year already lockdown started for many people around the world. This coming month will be a year for me and those of us in North America.

I remember at the start we thought at the latest we'd be out and about again in June.
I couldn’t write at the start of the pandemic. So I made these FEMINIST GIANT Dispatches from the Pandemic instead. This was Dispatch #1 on March 23
🎥 @rerutled
And this from May was the last one: Dispatch #9. I started writing after that one - FEMINIST GIANT is now my newsletter
feministgiant.com

🎥 @rerutled
The pandemic is a fucking disaster for women around the world and i
the massive setbacks it’s causing will be felt for decades.

That’s why I launched FEMINIST GIANT feministgiant.com

A future essay will be about crying.

I was not a crier in the Before Time. But I have relished shows and films that have made me cry. That catharsis was such a necessary relief.

We have not even started to reckon with grief.
In any case, as you can see from the above and 👇🏽 I look complete different to how I looked at the start of the pandemic.
It’s intentional. I did not want to emerge as if I’d just been waiting at home until it was safe to come out and pretend as If this monumental fucking disaster hadn’t happened
The pandemic’s immediate and long term pain: we have not fully reckoned with either

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More from @monaeltahawy

28 Feb
In 2011 when my arms were both casts, unable to do simplest of things for myself & adrift in a bottomless pit of grief, I felt I'd been robbed of beauty. I could present my 2 broken arms & say “Here are my wounds” but what to point to in explaining what trauma had robbed from me. Mona from the hips up weari...
Beauty, it had stolen beauty. And so bit by bit I rebuilt it.

After a visit to the orthopedic surgeon’s clinic, I would find a nearby nail salon and get my nails manicured and painted green and tweet the pictures - complete with a cast covering half of my hands. Mona's hand in a bandage, f...
Here I am, my green nails said. One step in front of another trying to walk forward to beauty: “listen I love you joy is coming.” (See Kim Addonizio poem in essay)

I was building what I call Deliberate Beauty feministgiant.com/p/deliberate-b…
Read 20 tweets
28 Feb
Glad to see more and outlets reporting on the role of white women in the January 6 insurrection. Here's my essay from January 10. It's the most viewed and shared of all my essays so far. Subscribe to FEMINIST GIANT feministgiant.com
White Women Storm the Capitol a thread on the essay
My essay about white women who stormed the Capitol was part one of this series. Part two was about the white women who supported the insurrection from within the Capitol: Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert feministgiant.com/p/a-white-supr…
Read 4 tweets
27 Feb
#Australia: remember when I asked “How long must we wait for men and boys to stop murdering us, to stop beating us and to stop raping us? How many rapists must we kill?"and this episode of Q&A was banned. My question remains: How many rapists must we kill?
And I did not then and I do not now mean state death penalties. The state already had a monopoly over violence. Fuck that.

I mean us. Those of us who are raped and assaulted and beaten. How many rapists must *we* kill until cis men stop raping us? feministgiant.com/p/i-beat-my-as…
The chapter in The Seven Necessary Sins for Women and Girls where I ask those questions is the most controversial in my book, I know. Here's an excerpt feministgiant.com/p/how-many-rap…
Read 4 tweets
27 Feb
This is part of my Perimenopause Papers - a series
Perimenopause Papers - part one of a series feministgiant.com/p/essay-fallin…
I wasn’t paying attention at first to either my perimenopause or the pandemic. Once they both started, you’re in an in-between that can take years so you’d better learn to acclimate. Perimenopause? Pandemic? It’s like a fucking Jeopardy but for hormones. feministgiant.com/p/deliberate-b…
Read 4 tweets
27 Feb
The pandemic & perimenopause--the right & left speaker that give stereo to my life--have fucked up my sleep. Accustomed now to waking up every 2hrs, I have a comfort routine: rather than surrendering to double hell of insomnia & hot flashes, I soothe myself w/eyeliner📷 @rerutled Mona from the shoulders up wearing a grey turtleneck tshirt
I surf websites of just about every cosmetics line known to humanity, and some which are not, that carries eyeliner in colours more than black and brown, and I lull myself with the blues, greens and purples feministgiant.com/p/deliberate-b…
And then when I give up trying to snatch any more 2hr pockets of sleep, I eat my breakfast, cleanse and moisturize and prepare for my favourite part of the day: holding a brush in one hand and a pot of eyeliner in the other as I apply the colour of the day around my eyes. 3 pots of eyeliner gel next to each other - purple with glit
Read 16 tweets
27 Feb
Since I started FEMINIST GIANT, all the words I don’t say face-to-face in public anymore, have gone into my writing. I’ve been writing more than I ever have - weekly, twice weekly. Where have all these words been?!

And this is my latest: Deliberate Beauty feministgiant.com/p/deliberate-b…
While reading up about eyeliner and ancient Egypt for that latest essay, I learned about Rihanna as Nefertiti- missed these in 2017! Rihanna wearing a Nefertiti headdress on the cover of Vogue Rihanna wearing a Nefertiti headdressRihanna wearing a Nefertiti headdress on the cover of Vogue
And Rihanna has a Nefertiti tattoo Rihanna in profile showing a small tattoo of Nefertiti on th
Read 4 tweets

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