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Sooz Kempner Profile picture
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4 Mar, 6 tweets, 2 min read
Malcolm Dempster has a spare room to rent.
Malcolm lays down a few rules for his lucky new tenant.
Malcolm shows off his best impressions.
Malcolm Dempster, the oldest man on Twitch, gives his opinion on pegging.
Malcolm has been watching some stuff on Netflix.
Malcolm Dempster lets us know how he feels about lemon parties.

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More from @SoozUK

Sooz Kempner Profile picture
4 Mar
FUCKING WHAT Image
THIS JUST SOUNDS LIKE STAR WARS MUSIC IF YOU PUT IT THROUGH THE TOTAL CUNT-A-TRON!
me: "I need to go to sleep"
me 2 minutes later: "I need to stay up night reading about Scientology's jazz band" theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2…
Read 4 tweets
Sooz Kempner Profile picture
2 Mar
THREAD: Postman Pat album listening party highlights.

On twitch.tv/soozkempner we listened to the whole of the Postman Pat album. Things got wild.
Postman Pat album Twitch listening party highlights #2

We talk about the Frasier reboot and check out my celeb.wiki which says I'm worth up to $5million.
Postman Pat album Twitch listening party highlights #3

We discuss whether or not Miss Rebecca Hubbard is a TERF and decide which Greendale residents are anti-vaxxers.
Read 5 tweets
Sooz Kempner Profile picture
7 Jan
OMG Trump's joined Parler and he's telling his 26 followers that they're true patriots.
Wow Milo just said "hi baby" and Trump DIDN'T ANSWER.
Hahaha bloody hell Milo wrote "erm hello?" and Trump still didn't answer so Milo said "fuck this, bye losers" and now everyone is slagging off Milo!
Read 33 tweets
Sooz Kempner Profile picture
5 Jan
MINI THREAD: I'd always wanted to do a comedy podcast with friends, just shooting the shit n that. In 2017 I recorded one called Sooz On Film for a few episodes where I was joined by guests to talk about movies, it was fun but I only did for a few months.
Just after Edinburgh 2018 @_chris_stokes said would I be up for being on HIS new podcast with @Masudmilas (who I didn't really know but had heard wasn't a jerk or anything). We recorded our pilot (I just looked it up) on November 8th 2018.
It was called Mystery on the Rocks and we'd bring together how Masud makes ace cocktails, Chris loves real-life unsolved mysteries and I love shouting. I mentioned I could write a song for each episode and perform it at the end. WHY DID I DO THAT!?
Read 6 tweets
Sooz Kempner Profile picture
17 Nov 20
THREAD: How the characters from Thomas the Tank Engine have been coping in the pandemic.

THOMAS: Really chuffed with the news of the two different vaccines. Has tweeted “pump it in to my veins!” several times and is dismayed that each tweet returns fewer RTs than the last. Image
HENRY: Flounced off Twitter in rage after getting criticised for tweeting “old people die, big deal” back in the summer. Really regrets it now since they thought of a really good Tiger King joke in mid-August. Image
PERCY: Initially baked obsessively then over the summer just posted endlessly about how rule-breakers were “ruining everything”. Is now just posting memories from a year ago hanging out with friends and captioning them all “heartbreaking x”. Image
Read 14 tweets
Sooz Kempner Profile picture
15 Nov 20
A lot of articles pointing out how "unity can win an election" based on how the left and centre unified to elect Biden yet these articles wag their fingers at the left. The left unified, huns. You said it yourselves. I agree with the sentiment but get some self-awareness.
I cannot describe how buoyed I am by Biden's win. I pointed out none of my misgivings about him in the months leading up to the election (haha VERY aware I'm a Brit with no vote). If centrists had treated the left the same here a year ago we wouldn't HAVE a Tory government.
I will ALWAYS understand issues people have with my specific ideologies to a point, I just wish they would extend that same understanding to the left. Solidarity, comrades.
Read 4 tweets

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