Thread by @vyrthandi

Today, I had a massive pain-gasm.

There’s probably a technical term for it, but I can’t imagine one could exist that’s more aptly descriptive.

Had it been pleasure instead, and of the same magnitude, I imagine I would have been quite euphoric. 💦

#LadyeVossSRS

Stepping back, yesterday I saw a picture of my vulva, labia spread. Some observations include:

• It looks natural, just healing. This includes its coloration.
• My clitoris is white, easy to find, and shaped like an upside down triangle so the ladies know I’m a lesbian.

• My vagina—whomst this entire time has felt like something separate and far away from my urethra and clitoris—is properly located and integrated within the lower folds of my labia minora, regardless of what my confused nerves may be telling my brain.

As of that point, I still had both the drains and the catheter in. I anticipated they’d come out sooner, and dilation would start Monday.

Instead, I will dilate tomorrow for the first time at 1:00 pm, after which Alec will pick me up and drive me home.

Dr. Schechter instructed Mira to remove the catheter this morning. We would have removed the drains too, as they‘ve been collecting virtually no discharge, but he didn’t want to make too many changes at once.

I was also switched from intravenous to oral antibiotics.

No catheter?! I did what any girl would do. I showered.

I didn’t need any assistance this time. I just wore the mesh panties halfway down my thighs to securely cradle the drains. Beth, one of the PCTs (patient care technicians) helped bread-bag my IV sites on my arms beforehand.

When I returned to my room, I was attired as I had came to the hospital last Monday, wearing a sports bra, tank top, and pajama bottoms.

I started doing my makeup in the bathroom once my hair had dried enough, but halfway through doing my eyes, I had to return to bed.

Annette, my nurse for today, brought several Vicodin, as I moaned in pain on my bed. In order to locate the source, I asked her to provide a glove so that I could find it while staying sanitary.

It was a blunt but pronounced pain, and it was emanating from my clitoris.

I still feel it now, 6 hours later. It’s just not as strong. Dull, but constant.

At the time, my pants were off, and my legs, of their own accord, with thighs together, were scrawling invisible eldritch sigils on the ceiling above. What weirding they wrought, I’ll never know.

The pain was primal. Sacred, secret. It felt to me like a rite of passage.

By removing the catheter, we had released some of the pressure that had kept the nerves dormant.

Now, they had rebooted and were coming online. I suspect this was not all of them at once. This’ll repeat.

All those nerves had been present in the tip of my penis. But now, they are folded over each other, and they’re densely packed.

In another 5 to 9 weeks, I’m going to enjoy using my mirror neurons to remap what doesn’t sort itself out in the intervening weeks.

Once pain become manageable, I ate and returned to my makeup routine. I take pride that I haven’t done the same eyeshadow layout twice in the last 19 days. I intend on posting at least one last selfie again tomorrow before I leave this hospital wing, hopefully for the last time.

I have deeply appreciated all of the love and support I’ve received from all of you. In lieu of visitors, interacting with you here in Twitter has helped me manage what would otherwise be a very lonely experience.

I plan on posting a master thread in the near future, linking all of the threads I’ve posted regarding this adventure in chronological order.

I also plan on posting some threads about my experiences with dilation, and of some new experiences that come with this hardware upgrade.

However, my mother will be arriving tomorrow to take care of me, and I may be less online once I return home—at least for a little bit.

As always, please feel free to ask any questions.

You’re all so considerate and conscientious, and I have not once been asked a question that I thought was inconsiderate or insensitive.

Thank you for being so lovely. 💖

As a final bit of self-promotion, I plan on streaming Bloodborne as soon as I can do so comfortably.

I envision it as a guided tour of Yharnan, a playthrough especially with those in mind who want to experience the game, but got too frustrated by its difficulty.

If you enjoyed these threads, I suspect you may enjoy my idle chatter while engaged in the mundane task of “[seeking] Paleblood to transcend the hunt.”

I’ll post details on my timeline as this approaches.

I’m in the middle of fighting a losing battle with Blue Cross Blue Shield to cover at least some of my FFS, and I hope that if I can deliver a fun streaming experience, I may be able to save up donations for that surgery without creating a gofundme.

Much love, everyone. 🥰💕