Thread by @sometimesalight

Having made hard choices to leave ministries over the years, I have so many thoughts right now. I know many of you are asking Qs about your own church contexts.

One thing I've learned is that faithfulness isn't just about place. It's about obeying the call of God.

When he says, "Go" & you better go. When he says, "Stay" & you better stay.

The Scripture is full of examples of God calling people to leave broken spaces & calling them to remain in broken spaces. There are models for faithfully fulfilling both callings. The key is responding to GOD, not simply your context.

This is harder than it sound. I've overstayed in places I should have exited. I've also had to exercise patience to remain in places I wanted to leave, waiting until God called me away.

This was made all the more difficult by growing up in a tradition that taught guilt by association. To be righteous, I was taught I had to be in the "right" space. The right church, the right school, the right party. If I wasn't, I was to blame.

So on top of trying to discern the voice of God, I also had to relearn what personal responsibility looked like. What am I responsible for in my context? What am I not? Where does perseverance end & complicity begin? (There is a point even if it's different for each.)

And on top of THAT, I had an overrealized sense of agency & personal choice. After all, if I was responsible for the brokenness of my context, then it was also w/in my grasp to simply *choose* a different one.

All that to say, these Qs are not simply a matter of choice. It's not simply about what you think you should/shouldn't do. Or what other people think you should/shouldn't do. It's about the specific work that God is calling you to. It's about obedience.

This should give us the ability to extend great freedom & grace to each other knowing that God is the one who calls us to go or stay. It should also teach us to tune our ears to his leading above all else.

And don't worry, he will call. He will make the path plain. It will probably be harder than you think you can walk & it may not make sense to others--or even yourself! But the point is to learn to follow wherever he leads.

Also, b/c it needs to be stated explicitly:

Part of the call of God on your life is caring for your own soul & the souls of those entrusted to you. One of the ways we've discerned it was time to leave a context was by assessing the state of our own hearts.

Insofar as we were spiritually struggling, deadened inside, increasingly lost & hopeless, it was an important signpost that it was time to leave. This is different than simply facing challenges of a broken context. This was spiritual death.

And too many folks minimized that for us, trying to normalize it: "This is just what ministry is like. You need a thicker skin!"

Church life can be hard, but it shouldn't be vampiric.

So, pay attention to the state of your heart, not simply the challenges of your context. Get the help you need & don't mistake spiritual & emotional collapse for endurance.