Thread by @LongShortTrader

My market predictions for rest of the year THREAD

S&P 500 will rise vertically to 6667 and then crash to 667 by Christmas.

Bridgewater and Remtech turn out to be the largest ponzu schemes in US history.

Bitcoin to zero, Etherium to $6,969,696.

Ben Bernanke turns out to be Satoshi, and a secret agent for the Saudis.

Yelled quits, declares she’s running for President.

All Short only funds up at least 100% by Christmas.

L/S as a category down -67%

$GSX stock goes to $1,000/share, $AMZN TO $100/share.

$TSLA gets acquired by $NIO, then declares bankruptcy.

$TSLAQ secedes from the USA, declares independence, as the first digitised nation on the blockchain. Realising they need land, $TSLAQ invades Taiwan.

Scientists discover a new moon near Jupiter, made out of pure gold.

This discovery sends gold futures and physical gold prices crashing -80% worldwide.

And this account will convert to a sub stack newsletter called the stockbabble charging $1,000/month.

End of Thread

https://twitter.com/agnostoxxx/status/1377633620173725703

Wealth inequality practically disappears by Christmas, as the wealthy’s paper wealth vanishes into thin air.

Public market investors bail out private equity for pennies on the $.

China resi “never goes down” real estate crashes -88%...even as China equities rise +88.8%, confounding every macro strategist in the world.

After getting acquired by $NIO, the combined $TSLA $NIO goes ch 11 in the USA. re-lists as an A share in China, up +300% on 1st day.

Cathie Wood’s $ARKK falls -79% by Christmas, but still outperforms the s&p 500 to the dismay of shorts, who pay neg rebates over -233%.

Cathie has the last laugh tho as ARK launches a series of new ETFs, including the “Ark China” etf and “ARK Disrupts Value Investing” etf