that fear of abandonment be fucking people up during intimate relationships. without doing that shadow work about where that fear comes from and working everyday to understand it and disprove it logically, the relationships always end up catastrophic and rollercoastery.
it's sad seeing the love bomb in the beginning or one give off an unreasonable amount of passion and intensity because they want to win someone over real bad to ensure they don't leave. then when they get a slight hint of dissatisfaction from their partner they start panicking.
it sucks when they think no matter how good things seem, the relationship is doomed. then its hard for them to believe that people will actually be there for them so they start self-sabotaging & projecting unreliable personality traits on the person who is really there for them.
they start clinging to the person which also ends up in self-fulfilling prophecy that the person will leave bc this pushes a person who isn't enjoying that level of neediness away. they'll even display fits of anger at the idea of losing their person to someone or something else.
some people who become aware that intimate relationships trigger this side of them that they don't recognize may avoid intimate relationships altogether because they hate the feeling of loss. they've convinced themselves they are incapable of coping with loss so they avoid.
what they don't realize is they go after people who present SOME level of reliability in terms of stability in a relationship but not FULL reliability. they're inadvertently continuing to perpetuate the belief from childhood that everybody leaves by choosing ppl who COULD leave.
some may not realize that unstable relationships are their comfort zone because of what they experienced during childhood. anything that is stable and easygoing may feel too foreign to them causing them to run or sabotage. they tend to reenact childhood abandonment.

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More from @gaialect

20 Mar
cancer 🕯careful who and what you try to make a home out of. home is within you, it always was and it always will be. there’s a theme of needing harmony in a situation but being too blind emotionally to efficiently achieve that. don’t overwork yourself with this one.
cancer 🕯you need to ground yourself in reality for a moment. look at things realistically, you cannot manipulate this situation. it simply is what it is. you had high hopes for it and it let you down not once but twice or more. all that glitters absolutely is not gold.
cancer 🕯it’s not that you didn’t see this coming, you did. a mile away in fact. you just wanted to be wrong about it because the attachment & company felt good. now there’s no ignoring what’s upfront of you. don’t sell yourself short by trying to dust things under the rug.
Read 4 tweets
20 Mar
leo⏳it seems like you haven’t been feeling appreciated by those around you & enough is enough. i sense a deep feeling of regret & disappointment. also some disbelief because you may be telling yourself “i did everything right so how did it end up like this”.
leo⏳lack of reciprocation from friends, family & partners seems to be a reoccurring theme for you. it’s time to stop asking why are they doing this to me & more so what can i change about myself to better avoid these uncomfortable dynamics i keep finding myself in.
leo⏳now this doesn’t mean it’s your fault but it’s time to look inward at what draws you into to these people that inevitably let you down. aside from that, i see you have an issue with projecting an image onto someone.
Read 6 tweets
13 Dec 20
i think lack of motivation & energy in an individual whether it be random or due to a depressive episode, is definitely a touchy subject but one that needs to be spoken about regardless. if our therapists are not helping us, then we need to help us. by any means necessary.
when an individual is not ready or in a deep state of self doubt, any solution regardless of how it’s delivered can feel like an attack. this is a symptom i know that. doesn’t mean i’ll stop trying to get my loved ones or twitter family to move they body. 🦋
but even anger in a response can highlight to the individual, where they are at in their healing process and what more still has to be done. emotions and expression, no matter which ones, are better than nothing. you are angry? okay good what are we gonna do with that anger.
Read 4 tweets
14 Nov 20
i need to work on my selftalk. the language i use w/ myself is important. it affects the way my brain perceives the world & thru affirmations i’m teaching my brain to view things in a different way. there’s psychological & neuroscience research supporting the use of affirmations.
apparently for affirmations to work they have to be used regularly & the more specific they are, the better. the goal is to really train your brain to feel as if it’s prepared and capable of anything & powerhouse for growth, adaptation & understanding.
according to cascio & colleagues in a study done in 2016, there is MRI evidence that suggest that certain neural pathways are increased when people practice self-affirmation tasks. specifically, the ventromedial prefrontal cortex which is involved in positive evaluation &
Read 13 tweets
13 Nov 20
november tarot for the zodiac signs
🌿 you can apply your sun, moon, rising and venus sign 🌿
if the messages don’t apply then let it fly!
tips are always welcome :)
cashapp: $gaialect
venmo: gaialect
you can book a personal reading with me at 🤍
Read 12 tweets

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