Hot take but many inspirational quotes are ableist; "just do it! will is power! The power of the mind!". That's exactly what ADHDers cannot do. Like, neurologically cannot do. Also true for other neurodivergent people, brain fog, chronic illness, etc.
There's so many scenarios where people cannot "just do it". And yet it keeps being pushed down our throats and we're shamed and made feel like failures when we can't achieve those unrealistic expectations. Making everyone believe the power of will is enough is a big, ableist lie.
That "will of power" discourse inevitably leads to "if they don't do it, they must not want to do it". So people who cannot do it start hearing "you don't care. You're selfish. You're lazy". That's where the guilt starts. The self deprecation. The depression. The distress.
So you have disabled people who keep trying their best to meet unrealistic expectations and falling short every time, causing self esteem issues and affecting their mental health. Without knowing why, not understanding what's wrong with them, feeling like a failure.
As long as that discourse exists, many disabled people will fall into that endless cycle of shame and distress. It takes years, luck and perseverance to understand yourself and stop buying into it. And even then, that guilt is ingrained and resurfaces to make you doubt yourself.
It's a burden most of us carry for the rest of our lives, lurking in the back of our heads. Wondering if we're faking it, if we're enough, if we aren't just lazy, if we could maybe try harder. It might never fully go away.
Power of will discourse is toxic, ableist and damaging.
Power of will discourse is toxic, ableist and damaging.
If you're going through this, remember, you're not alone! Finding a community of people like you really helps sharing the burden and finding reassurance. There's many people who understand and relate to your struggles. Don't give up 💖
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