Thread by @TheBlackNerd

The situational support stemming from police killing a black person lasts for about a week and isn't substantial in any sense and, I know in my case, makes me feel like shit on multiple levels

https://twitter.com/itskindred/status/1381611671010095105

"Is this actual support or do people just feel bad?"

"This massive influx of support all at once is overwhelming"

"The complete flatlining of support makes me feel like absolute dogshit"

"Is my work actually good or is it pity"

Oh, here's a perfect example

The discrepancy between when the protests were all over the news last year vs some random day a few weeks ago

I was driving down the highway last week and shortly after I passed a state trooper on the side of the highway, he pulled off and started driving

There's about a minute which felt like an eternity of wondering if he was coming after me and whether things would turn bad or not

But, also, this wasn't just last week

It's nearly every week, driving down the highway or coming home wondering if I'm going to end up running into the wrong police officer who's decided I'm in the wrong for a variety of reasons, one of them being black and alive

The fear of becoming a hashtag or the fear of my family having to set up a GoFundMe and the fear of nothing changing and the fear of it getting worse is constantly in the back of my mind every morning when I'm driving to work and then I just

have to be a regular person

In conclusion, I just want to feel like anything good happening to me isn't incidental

That doing well isn't dependent upon my or someone else's suffering